Archive for the ‘Newcomers to Recovery’ Category
I’m new
Hi I'm new to this site. I joined because I'm quiting heroine and cocaine cold turkey. I took my last shot today at 4 am. I'm detoxing at home and I'm here for support.
I'm 17 years old. I've been using for 5 years and this is my first time detoxing. So naturaly I'm scared. So any advice or words of encouragement would greatly appreciated.
I'm 17 years old. I've been using for 5 years and this is my first time detoxing. So naturaly I'm scared. So any advice or words of encouragement would greatly appreciated.
LouLou629 has 91 days today!
Way to go LouLou on 91 days! I had to do a little math to determine your days but it merits a celebration!:bday8
:fireworks2 That's an awesome milestone! I'm impressed!!:c029:
:fireworks2 That's an awesome milestone! I'm impressed!!:c029:
drinking with him?
Hi, I've been rreading for a while, today is my first post.
I'm not sure if my husband is an alcoholic or not. We used to fight all the time because he would come home late or drunk or both. But when we were out drinking together, we always had a good time.
He stopped drinking a few months ago but after a big fight, he started again and has just asked me if i want to go out for a beer with him after work.
We had just a week before talked about him maybe trying to drink 'responsibly' but we didn't have a chance to talk about what's acceptable because we had that fight and he went out and got drunk and we havent talked about it since.
Now, i really used to enjoy drinking with him, but I'm not sure if I should now cuz I don't know if that's sending mixed signals.
Is it ever ok to go out and drink with someone who may or may not have a problem?
I'm not sure if my husband is an alcoholic or not. We used to fight all the time because he would come home late or drunk or both. But when we were out drinking together, we always had a good time.
He stopped drinking a few months ago but after a big fight, he started again and has just asked me if i want to go out for a beer with him after work.
We had just a week before talked about him maybe trying to drink 'responsibly' but we didn't have a chance to talk about what's acceptable because we had that fight and he went out and got drunk and we havent talked about it since.
Now, i really used to enjoy drinking with him, but I'm not sure if I should now cuz I don't know if that's sending mixed signals.
Is it ever ok to go out and drink with someone who may or may not have a problem?
Re-introduction
Hi everyone,
My name is "dionysianstupor" and I am an alcoholic and compulsive overeater...also a "tortured artist," but I'm working on being a sober one. ;-) I love performance and conceptual art, critical theory/philosophy, and writing. I've posted here before under a different name, but that was back during my questioning period and I figured I'd just start anew. I still don't always believe that I am an alcoholic because my creative mind tricks me into thinking I have multiple selves, but I had a pseudo-spiritual experience last week where my Higher Power was sending me signs (through art!) to stop drinking...so I've chosen to listen.
Nice to meet you all!
This is Day 4 for me. (And my drink of choice is wine.)
My name is "dionysianstupor" and I am an alcoholic and compulsive overeater...also a "tortured artist," but I'm working on being a sober one. ;-) I love performance and conceptual art, critical theory/philosophy, and writing. I've posted here before under a different name, but that was back during my questioning period and I figured I'd just start anew. I still don't always believe that I am an alcoholic because my creative mind tricks me into thinking I have multiple selves, but I had a pseudo-spiritual experience last week where my Higher Power was sending me signs (through art!) to stop drinking...so I've chosen to listen.
Nice to meet you all!
This is Day 4 for me. (And my drink of choice is wine.)
were you scared too?
Were you scared of sobriety because I am...
Were you scared of admitting you had a problem?
Were you scared of the withdrawal?
Were you scared of the depression?
Were you scared of sleepless nights?
Were you scared of minutes that feel like hours? Hours that feel like days?
Were you scared of failing? succeeding?
Were you scared of boredom or becoming a boring person?
Were you afraid of losing people?
Were you afraid of the outside world because temptation is everywhere?
Were you afraid of never finding the "real" you?
Were you afraid of the "real" you?
Were you afraid of the thought of never drinking again?
Were you scared of people not believing in you? Not supporting you?
Were you afraid of ridding one addiction only to find another?
Were you afraid of life?
Were you afraid of being happy?
Were you scared of admitting you had a problem?
Were you scared of the withdrawal?
Were you scared of the depression?
Were you scared of sleepless nights?
Were you scared of minutes that feel like hours? Hours that feel like days?
Were you scared of failing? succeeding?
Were you scared of boredom or becoming a boring person?
Were you afraid of losing people?
Were you afraid of the outside world because temptation is everywhere?
Were you afraid of never finding the "real" you?
Were you afraid of the "real" you?
Were you afraid of the thought of never drinking again?
Were you scared of people not believing in you? Not supporting you?
Were you afraid of ridding one addiction only to find another?
Were you afraid of life?
Were you afraid of being happy?
Are you disciplined?
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Discipline
Children need discipline to feel secure; so do adults.
Discipline means understanding there are logical consequences to our behavior. Discipline means taking responsibility for our behavior and the consequences.
Discipline means learning to wait for what we want.
Discipline means being willing to work for and toward what we want.
Discipline means learning and practicing new behaviors.
Discipline means being where we need to be, when we need to be there, despite our feelings.
Discipline is the day to day performing of tasks, whether these are recovery behaviors or washing the dishes.
Discipline involves trusting that our goals will be reached though we cannot see them.
Discipline can be grueling. We may feel afraid, confused, and uncertain. Later, we will see the purpose. But this clarity of sight usually does not come during the time of discipline. We may not even believe we're moving forward.
But we are.
The task at hand during times of discipline is simple: listen, trust, and obey.
Higher Power, help me learn to surrender to discipline. Help me be grateful that You care enough about me to allow these times of discipline and learning in my life. Help me know that as a result of discipline and learning, something important will have been worked out in me.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
You are reading from the book The Language of Letting Go
Discipline
Children need discipline to feel secure; so do adults.
Discipline means understanding there are logical consequences to our behavior. Discipline means taking responsibility for our behavior and the consequences.
Discipline means learning to wait for what we want.
Discipline means being willing to work for and toward what we want.
Discipline means learning and practicing new behaviors.
Discipline means being where we need to be, when we need to be there, despite our feelings.
Discipline is the day to day performing of tasks, whether these are recovery behaviors or washing the dishes.
Discipline involves trusting that our goals will be reached though we cannot see them.
Discipline can be grueling. We may feel afraid, confused, and uncertain. Later, we will see the purpose. But this clarity of sight usually does not come during the time of discipline. We may not even believe we're moving forward.
But we are.
The task at hand during times of discipline is simple: listen, trust, and obey.
Higher Power, help me learn to surrender to discipline. Help me be grateful that You care enough about me to allow these times of discipline and learning in my life. Help me know that as a result of discipline and learning, something important will have been worked out in me.
From The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie ©1990, Hazelden Foundation.
Recovery meeting tonight.
"AAA (All Addicts Anonymous) Meeting"
in the SR CHATROOM
Tuesday at 9:00 pm Eastern Standard Time
in the SR CHATROOM
Tuesday at 9:00 pm Eastern Standard Time
Need to work out your timezone? The World Clock – Time Zone Converter
^^^^^:grinattk: ^^^^^^^^^^ :grinattk:^^^^^
If you are sober, currently in recovery, or still struggling with alcohol, drugs, or any type of addiction, feel free to join us for a group discussion! You are more than welcome to suggest any topic you want to discuss or just come and listen.
We look forward to seeing both old and new SR.com members, and discussing addiction and sobriety!
See you there! :ghug
Click here to go to meeting -----> AAA meeting
invisible line
i have seen so many people say "when you cross over that invisible line, there is no turning back." what is the invisible line and how do you know you have crossed it. why after crossing it is there suddenly no turning back? i am confused.
my introduction.
I have only had the opportunity to read just a few threads (as I am new here), however, it is obvious to me this forum is full of people that have good hearts and are here to help.
I don't consider myself an alcoholic, however, alcohol is a problem in my life. I've had my share of issues in my life. I suppose developing an alcohol problem doesn't occur without some sort of trigger point. I have had many difficult events in my life. I am currently struggling with sharing them as it seems like I'm complaining or making excuses for where I am in life, or more accurately, where I am not in my life.
I am a product of a dysfunctional family. I'm not sure even where to start. I am 43 years old and have enjoyed a successful career that I am thankful for, however, that's been the extent of any success in my life. I have good friends, but I've endured two failed marriages, a loss of my only sibling (my brother) due to suicide and the realization that my family is dysfunctional and nearly incapable of any real ability to love openly and honestly without strings attached or expectations. Unconditional love is simply non existant in my family. Thankfully I escaped that lack of ability. I am completely the opposite. That maybe is one of my downfalls where people seek people like me to take from...until I have no more to give.
That's kind of where I've been over the last 3 years...isolating myself from those that I feel are toxic, including my parents. The loss of my brother, to whom I was extremely close to, was and still is devistating to me. I went through counseling on a weekly basis for over a year and feel that I've accepted his loss to the extent possible. I feel like I have a healthy acceptance about his loss.
I can't seem to find the strength to deal with the issues in my family anymore. I'm tired of walking on eggshells around my parents. I'm tired of dealing with the drama they love and embrace, all the while getting nothing of value from them from an emotional perspective. I barely speak to my mother (my parents are divorced). I do interact with my father on a more regular basis, however, I've recently decided to distance myself from him over some disturbing events of late. My brother had 3 wonderful kids...I am glad to be able to see more of them over the last year (that has been a struggle too as his ex wife is a awful person who played a large role in his suicide).
I suppose that stuff is just the tip of the iceberg so to speak...again I feel like I'm crying "oh poor me" here and I don't wish to do that. I feel stuck in life...I used to be so driven. Since his loss, that drive left me. I'm just existing..and I can't attribute that all to drinking quite honestly. I use a quote from the movie "shawshenk redemption" "Get busy living, or get busy dying". I try to use that to inspire me to move forward with my life, yet I can't get that traction to really launch my life forward. I do acknowledge that since April I am making strides forward. I am trying to accept that maybe this time it will move more slowly than I used to be able to achieve earlier in my life.
I feel like if I can honestly say that if alcohol is an issue in my life, then I should quit. I haven't gone over a week without a drink in a long time. I drank on weekends in highschool and college, then I got married and didn't really drink at all for 8 years. Then I got divorced, started a new job and have been drinking nearly every day for the last 12 years. During those 12 years I dove into my career and enjoyed a lot of success. But now I am stuck working maybe 3 days a week and not doing much besides that. I used to work nearly 7 days a week. I have dealt with depression and anxiety disorders in my past. I do feel I am over those issues, however, I do find that I drink to deal with unresolved issues in my life. The major issues I face (loss of my brother and my family issues) will remain unresolved. My parents think they are perfect so...I have tried. They are older now so I really don't address the issues to save them the heartache I guess.
Anyway, that's my situation from a 30k foot level. I am on day 3 without a drink and would like that to continue. I've given thought to joining an AA meeting to get a feel for what it is like. I'm not sure I'd be accepted because I think you have to commit to never having a drink again. What do you suggest someone like me do? Give up drinking entirely? Is alcohol something that is an all or nothing issue?
I hope my post meets with approval and understanding. I am here to support others too.
Thanks for listening...
I don't consider myself an alcoholic, however, alcohol is a problem in my life. I've had my share of issues in my life. I suppose developing an alcohol problem doesn't occur without some sort of trigger point. I have had many difficult events in my life. I am currently struggling with sharing them as it seems like I'm complaining or making excuses for where I am in life, or more accurately, where I am not in my life.
I am a product of a dysfunctional family. I'm not sure even where to start. I am 43 years old and have enjoyed a successful career that I am thankful for, however, that's been the extent of any success in my life. I have good friends, but I've endured two failed marriages, a loss of my only sibling (my brother) due to suicide and the realization that my family is dysfunctional and nearly incapable of any real ability to love openly and honestly without strings attached or expectations. Unconditional love is simply non existant in my family. Thankfully I escaped that lack of ability. I am completely the opposite. That maybe is one of my downfalls where people seek people like me to take from...until I have no more to give.
That's kind of where I've been over the last 3 years...isolating myself from those that I feel are toxic, including my parents. The loss of my brother, to whom I was extremely close to, was and still is devistating to me. I went through counseling on a weekly basis for over a year and feel that I've accepted his loss to the extent possible. I feel like I have a healthy acceptance about his loss.
I can't seem to find the strength to deal with the issues in my family anymore. I'm tired of walking on eggshells around my parents. I'm tired of dealing with the drama they love and embrace, all the while getting nothing of value from them from an emotional perspective. I barely speak to my mother (my parents are divorced). I do interact with my father on a more regular basis, however, I've recently decided to distance myself from him over some disturbing events of late. My brother had 3 wonderful kids...I am glad to be able to see more of them over the last year (that has been a struggle too as his ex wife is a awful person who played a large role in his suicide).
I suppose that stuff is just the tip of the iceberg so to speak...again I feel like I'm crying "oh poor me" here and I don't wish to do that. I feel stuck in life...I used to be so driven. Since his loss, that drive left me. I'm just existing..and I can't attribute that all to drinking quite honestly. I use a quote from the movie "shawshenk redemption" "Get busy living, or get busy dying". I try to use that to inspire me to move forward with my life, yet I can't get that traction to really launch my life forward. I do acknowledge that since April I am making strides forward. I am trying to accept that maybe this time it will move more slowly than I used to be able to achieve earlier in my life.
I feel like if I can honestly say that if alcohol is an issue in my life, then I should quit. I haven't gone over a week without a drink in a long time. I drank on weekends in highschool and college, then I got married and didn't really drink at all for 8 years. Then I got divorced, started a new job and have been drinking nearly every day for the last 12 years. During those 12 years I dove into my career and enjoyed a lot of success. But now I am stuck working maybe 3 days a week and not doing much besides that. I used to work nearly 7 days a week. I have dealt with depression and anxiety disorders in my past. I do feel I am over those issues, however, I do find that I drink to deal with unresolved issues in my life. The major issues I face (loss of my brother and my family issues) will remain unresolved. My parents think they are perfect so...I have tried. They are older now so I really don't address the issues to save them the heartache I guess.
Anyway, that's my situation from a 30k foot level. I am on day 3 without a drink and would like that to continue. I've given thought to joining an AA meeting to get a feel for what it is like. I'm not sure I'd be accepted because I think you have to commit to never having a drink again. What do you suggest someone like me do? Give up drinking entirely? Is alcohol something that is an all or nothing issue?
I hope my post meets with approval and understanding. I am here to support others too.
Thanks for listening...
Showhorse
Good Morning,
I am a newby and I am hoping to find help and healing.
I am a newby and I am hoping to find help and healing.
