Drug Rehab Options Blog

I put this thread in the new to recovery (alcoholic forum, Think I made a mistake)
As an Admin for a pc help site I know how frustrating it can be at times!

Here is the story thus far.

Where to start? I have been helping others on pc forums for years, so you would think I would feel at ease doing this!

My name is Brandon and about 5 years ago I had a kidney stone. The doctors gave me a prescription for Vicodin. Well I took the 2 I was supposed to and got real out of it and forgot I took 2 and took 2 more. All of a sudden I was struck with sooo much energy I cleaned the house (wife was happy) and stayed up for a whole day. This is where my addiction started.

About 3 years ago my doc would no longer prescribe me the pills so I started hospital jumping (I think that is what you call it) and I got pretty good at it.(stuck pins in my fingers to fake blood in my urine which show's a kidney stone etc.)

Now 4 years later I just moved to Indiana and have visited 4 hospitals about 4 or 5 times each. I am addicted to the energy they give me. I really dont get "high" off of them but get tons of energy. After reading a little bit it seems I dont take as many as one can. I usually take 4 or 5 7.5's a day. 3 at once and another 2 later in the day.
I find coming off of them though feels the same as others have expressed. Feels like getting hit by a truck, no energy depressed and agitated. My wife is getting fed up with it (as she should) I wish I knew what to do. My pride gets in the way of going to rehab, I also suffer from Panic Disorder and take 2 Mg's of Klonopin a day for almost 10 years. (have not abused those) and the Vicodin took care of the panic attacks as well. Have been off of them for 2 days now and just feel like crud. Have exhausted hospitals (which is good) just afraid I will start going to different dentists now and telling them my tooth hurts. I told my wife to hide the keys so I wont, but I have to go to work. She says I get really angry when she wont give me the keys (as she knows what I am up to).

Sorry for the long post but it feels good to tell someone (even if it is online) this story as I have not told anyone ever before (except the wife) I know it is not good for my kids to see me lying around when I come off the pills.
SO my question is what can or should I do?

Where to start? I have been helping others on pc forums for years, so you would think I would feel at ease doing this!

My name is Brandon and about 5 years ago I had a kidney stone. The doctors gave me a prescription for Vicodin. Well I took the 2 I was supposed to and got real out of it and forgot I took 2 and took 2 more. All of a sudden I was struck with sooo much energy I cleaned the house (wife was happy) and stayed up for a whole day. This is where my addiction started.

About 3 years ago my doc would no longer prescribe me the pills so I started hospital jumping (I think that is what you call it) and I got pretty good at it.(stuck pins in my fingers to fake blood in my urine which show's a kidney stone etc.)

Now 4 years later I just moved to Indiana and have visited 4 hospitals about 4 or 5 times each. I am addicted to the energy they give me. I really dont get "high" off of them but get tons of energy. After reading a little bit it seems I dont take as many as one can. I usually take 4 or 5 7.5's a day. 3 at once and another 2 later in the day.
I find coming off of them though feels the same as others have expressed. Feels like getting hit by a truck, no energy depressed and agitated. My wife is getting fed up with it (as she should) I wish I knew what to do. My pride gets in the way of going to rehab, I also suffer from Panic Disorder and take 2 Mg's of Klonopin a day for almost 10 years. (have not abused those) and the Vicodin took care of the panic attacks as well. Have been off of them for 2 days now and just feel like crud. Have exhausted hospitals (which is good) just afraid I will start going to different dentists now and telling them my tooth hurts. I told my wife to hide the keys so I wont, but I have to go to work. She says I get really angry when she wont give me the keys (as she knows what I am up to).

Sorry for the long post but it feels good to tell someone (even if it is online) this story as I have not told anyone ever before (except the wife) I know it is not good for my kids to see me lying around when I come off the pills.
SO my question is what can or should I do?

Edit: I hope this in the right forum.. As I now see the NA forum =(

Hey all, I'm new to this forum, but I wanted to discuss or have a place to vent where people know where I'm coming from. I'm a young professional chef, worked my way up within the culinary industry since I was 15 years old. I suffered from a drug addiction & alcoholism for almost 3 years. Although I'm clean now, sometimes I feel like going back, because my line of work drives me insane & I still don't know how I'm functioning sober. If there is anyone out there who are within the industry & would like to share, please do!

I found my way to here after a constant back and forth fight to figure things out.

I wouldnt say that i crave a drink although after a crazy week i like to go out with a some friends and have a few drinks. Sometimes we will have a few drinks at each others house or what not.

There have been more than a handful of times over the past 3 years where i have blacked out and done something really embarrassing or something that i regretted. This is the only time i feel like i may have a problem, right after doing something that i feel horrable about while drunk.

I was proud of myself because more recently i have been able to have a beer or two and be fine. I do that for a while and then all of a sudden i do something really out of character which results in me feeling really stupid.

Im not sure what else to say. I am embarrased over a recent situation. Im feeling as i have before, that by saying something i am condeming myself in some way to something that isnt me. But maybe it is.

xAH screwed up our tax return for 2005, treating his withdrawal of his 401k as normal income (yeah I know I shoulda paid attention back then). So the IRS is of course saying we owe back taxes, to the tune of over $6200. xAH says he never got notified (this was back before the divorce) and he can't pay anyway since he is still unemployed (3+ years now) and that it's my problem. ARRRGGGG!

Anyway, I am finally meeting with a lawyer tomorrow to find out how much it's going to cost me to get out of this altogether or at least lower the amount I end up paying. Apparently there is at least a chance I will get out of it totally under something called the innocent spouse rule (don't ya love the name of that rule?)

So hopefully hiring these folks won't break the bank. If I can get the amount lowered substantially it'll be worth it. And it will sever the final remaining loose end with xAH. What a bonus that will be!

Hi, I'm new to this board!! Hello to everyone.

I was hoping someone could help me understand my boyfriends addiction. We have been together for 5 years and have a 2 year old daughter.

3 years ago he broke his back and started taking vicodin for the pain,he had a rx. That eventually got out of control and he started taking his rx plus what ever he could get his hands on. Things stated tapering off (or so I thought) and then the migraines started. Because of his dependence to Vicodin he somehow convinced a pain mgmt dr to prescribe him Oxycodone. He has been on that now for that past year.

A month ago he had surgery for carpal tunnel and is now on even more rx's and is home all the time so I am noticing things more. Last week I noticed rolled up dollar bills and some other VERY strange stuff and confronted him and made him take a drug test thinking it was coke. Well he only came up positive for opiods. He told me he was rx'd 80mg of oxycodone and he crushes it up to make 1 pill 4 so he's taking less. Everything I've looked up online says that's not a good sign.

He promised me he would stop everything and try to find another way to manage his pain. Then yesterday he lied to me and went to pick up some more pills from his dealer and came home with oxycodone and suboxone (which he DOESNT have a rx for). He told me he wanted to get on suboxone for the withdrawal symptoms but after researching that I've also seen that can be abused.

Im at such a total loss at where to go from here. Should I believe he is using this to get clean or should I step in and demand something more be done? I have my daughter to worry about first and I can't have her grow up like me, with out a dad because he's an addict. If someone has been there done that I would love to hear stories and if his story sounds on the up and up. Thanks for letting me get this out, I really don't know where to turn.

I am recently engaged (about 6 months) and my fiance is a recovering drug addict. He was clean for 3 years, and just this past week he went on a 4 day bender, using crack. He didn't call me until the 4th day, by then I was sick to death with worry, if he was ok, or dead, or in trouble with the police! I have never had this as part of my life before, and I do not know what I should do! All my family and friends are telling me I should take my daughter and RUN! I love him, and want to be supportive, but I do not want this around my daughter! Please give this clueless non-addict some advice! Thanks!
:praying for guidance!

I'm new here. Day 16. (again).Insert eye roll.

It's got to work this time.

LSS, Yes I know I'm an alcoholic, I never truly doubted that, just thought I could control it, but after 3 years of serious self abuse in the aftermath of Katrina, My Mother in Law's cancer diagnosis and subsequent death, loss of a business, bankruptcy, and a host of other, some more serious events... It became more than apparent that Nope, The Bottle had Control.

The sneaking, the hiding, the emotional wreckage, the damage I have wrought on myself and others, I simply cannot do it anymore. My wonderful husband has been far more patient than anyone deserves, but he'd had it. So had my stepchildren, employees and friends. It was essentially, " I have an appt to have all the locks re keyed this afternoon, you either get help or get out" ( this is not the first time, not even close).

So... I was handed a one way ticket to my Mom's, he called the locksmith and cancelled. I detoxed for 4 hellish days ( done it before, God that sucks) On day 5 I went to my 1st meeting in 18 years. went to 4 meetings a week, walked 3 miles a day, and lo and behold I feel physically anyway, human.

I go back to New Orleans ( a fine place for an alcoholic to live, dontcha think?) Tomorrow. I am exceedingly grateful that there is a meeting at 7:15 every morning 4 blocks away from the restaurant we have there.

I have far to many wonderful things in my life to throw them away for something that I know will kill me.

Being at Mom's has in fact been an easier, gentler way. God Bless her. The hard part will begin tomorrow. I just pray that I didn't burn those bridges, That I can repair the damage and regain some level of trust that I really don't deserve. I hope to prove to myself first of all and to my husband, that I can get back to being me, a better me, god forbid , a PRODUCTIVE me. Not the drunken, falling down, breaking bones slug that I've been off and on for more than 3 years.

That Rabbithole just kept getting deeper and deeper. It's time to throw away the damned shovel and live my life above ground. I have a life to live, a business to run and people to feed. It's going to be hard, but I'm going to take it one day, sometimes one minute at a time.

It kills me that I hurt so many and let so many people down. That said, I'm working very hard at NOT wallowing in self loathing, it's there, but I'm trying desperately to focus on the task at hand and the positives I have in my life, and trying not to set myself up for yet another relapse. I get too damned over confident. Embrace the humble ( she said to herself).

I guess that's pretty much it for right now. I need to get organized for my flight home tomorrow morning.

Prior to this post, I have been reading and familarizing myself with this board, and I truly think that it is going to be a bit of a Godsend for those rough patches and times I can't get to a meeting.

Thanks for being here

Hi all, I'm new here. I just found out last week that my boyfriend of 18 years and father of my children, has been taking cocaine for over a year. I asked him to leave over a month ago as his behaviour was becoming intolerable, not knowing that he had this addiction. Things have been strained between us for some time as I had to return to work 3 years ago when he couldn't (or wouldn't) find work. I have been becoming increasingly fed up at doing a days work and then coming home to pick the kids up from school, cook dinner, wash clothes, clean etc... He couldn't seem to understand why I was so fed up and why I didn't want to be intimate with him as much as he wanted. He has done some private work which I needed to pay the mortgage as the tenant in our other flat was not paying the rent. He kept telling me that he hadn't been paid for these jobs and made a big show of making phone calls (which I now know were all an act) to ask for the money. Over the last few months he has also been draining money out of our bank account, including using money set aside for my boys' birthday presents. We are now in the position that I am so far behind on the mortgage that we may lose both of our apartments. I'm trying to sell the one we don't live in but it's very difficult at the moment.

I'm finding it very hard to deal with all the lies that he has told me and that he could be so irresponsible to let it get to a point that our children could be made homeless. He is now trying to make me feel that this is all my fault. He has told me today that it's my fault that he started taking cocaine (he has always smoked marijuana-something that I also did in my youth but stopped 14 years ago). I feel so cheated and betrayed right now and feel like I am slipping into a deep pit of depression, I feel that the last 18 years have been nothing but lies and don't know how to separate lies from truth. I want to try to be supportive but, I can't bear to even look at him at the moment. He's not the person that I thought he was and I feel cheated of a partner and friend as well as a father for my children. I don't know how to deal with all of this. I have some good friends around me but I have no family here and I don't think they would be very understanding anyway. Everything I've worked for seems to be crumbling away through no fault of my own and yet, he's trying to burden me with the guilt. Is this usual for an addict to blame someone else for their own weakness or do I need to shoulder some of the blame? My friends tell me that I have nothing to feel bad about but, are they just saying that because they are my friends?

Thanks for listening.

Hi everyone. I separated from my alcoholic about 3 years ago. By the time I left I was emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually broken. I didn't think I would ever recover from the abuse. I went to see a therapist and she advised me to go to alanon. I went to my first meeting and an older man in the room rushed over to me after the meeting to give me a hug. I felt very uncomfortable, so I stuck my hand out to shake his. Later I thought about it and thought maybe I was being to stand offisih. I started seeing this man at meetings and we started talking about how similar our childhoods were and alanon. He has been a very good listener and has helped me a lot since he has been in the program for 10 years. It came out that he wanted more than a friendship and I am not ready for a relationship at this time. He had told me he is a sex addict, which I did not want to get involved with anything like that. I kind of distanced myself from him and started talking to other people in Alanon. I received an e-mail notification that he has been searching my name online. I was so scared that I stopped going to meetings for a while. I finally e-mailed him the notification I received and asked him if there was something he wanted to know about me. He said he just wanted to see how I was doing. I know that is a lie or else he would have e-mailed me directly. I am afraid of running into him at meetings after these events and I don't know what to do. I am hoping someone on here can give me some advice.