Drug Rehab Options Blog

Hi all. Not sure if the correct new comers forum, but wanted to introduce myself. I am the significant other of someone in recovery from alcohol abuse. Three days in rehab and so far so good.

My parents were alcoholics, my older brother was and now sober for many years, another brother was addicted to pain medication. A lot of history and emotions to deal with. I thought I was finished with all of this as 33 years not being around any type of substance abuse and now I am knocked over by how far gone 'my guy' really is.

I am scared to death of relapse when he gets out and comes home. One day at a time!

Not what I expected for a Christmas present (he wanted to propose):Xmasistar, but instead admitted he has a problem and went into rehab! Could not ask for a better gift.

Enjoy your day everyone and sorry if I posted in the wrong newcomers forum.

I would like to know from others about their experiences with infidelity.

My ex drank everyday in our 30+ marriage. (a 6 pack or two in the beginning of our marriage and the last 15 years at least a bottle of wine a night and then also a glass of schnaps or cognac)

He held, and still holds, a very good job and could put on the front of an outgoing, happy man (to the outsdie world). He was different at home. Always complaining about something. I knew he was moody, but never suspected that he had a "buddy", as he called his girlfriend.

I could deal with his behavior until I found out about the "buddy" of +20 years. I never knew about her He was such a chronic liar. He was a great actor. (My ex needed to be "on the road" often bec. of his job.)

Is infidelity something that is OK with alcoholics? I think it is a combination of bad character and alcohol.

I go to Alanon and it has helped me, but I still wonder.. did I simply marry a person without character or did the alcohol change his values?????

Thank you!

Hi Family,
My network of women is relapsing like crazy this week. My first temp. sponsor relapsed with 5 years clean...yikes...and so many other women in my home group went back out this same weekend. One lady had over 15 years clean! Is it the holidays? This is my first recovery Christmas, so I don't know if people generally relapse more at this time of year or not, but it sure sucks.

One lady in my area died of OD this week,
One went to jail after a non-fatal OD where the police came (she had drugs on her still)
And I just got a call that one of my closest friends in my home group is now is critical care at the hospital for alcohol abuse again(she has a severe medical condition that is aggravated by drinking).

So there we have it covered in my area:
Hospitals, institutions and death.
I'm praying that we all remember, including me, that having to pick up a new white chip is the least of what can happen if we use. The ones who got a chance to pick up a chip this time all told me that it didn't get any better out there, so if anyone is wondering, they did the research for you, and it still sucks, so you don't need to try it.
Let's all have a merry clean Christmas, so that we can enjoy a happy new year. I don't want to lose anyone out of my SR homegroup!
Love and prayers from
KJ:candle6D:

alright, as you all know, its been a tough week for me. fighting with the boyfriend...problems at work...yadayadayada. well, two days ago my pc crashed. was pretty worried i wouldn't get it working again. but luckily, with a restore cd and fifty bucks to talk to a guy in india for three hours, i'm back online.

rambling aside... i've been thinking a lot about pills lately. i miss the way they made me feel. i miss the energy. i miss feeling like i could accomplish any task under the sun. i miss feeling fulfilled. i even miss the way i would abuse them (crushing them up and snorting them *i know, it was bad*). i miss that rush. i miss walking around work, knowing i had 5 lortab 10mgs stuck in my bra and i could take one whenever my heart desired.

does anyone else ever think about these things? i mean, we all know that our drug/alcohol abuse was a bad thing, but do you ever miss how good it made you feel?

don't get me wrong, i love knowing that i'm doing something wonderful with my life. its just hard not to think about all the times i've used. all the fun stuff i did. sometimes i wonder if i can have a good time without drugs.

Hi All,

I hope you can offer me some suggestions or understanding..

I'm a 23 year old female and the daughter of a drunk.

My dad has been a drunk for as long as I can remember and is also father to 3fantastic children and has a wonderful wife who he married at the age of 19. My dad is now in his 50's and after a lifetime of drugs/alcohol abuse and years of rehab is still a drunk.

This is the first post for me, and also the first time that I have told my secret as I was made to feel ashamed and embarrassed as a child about my father.

Dad has had years and years of support and love from his family and was sober for a period of 6 years after my baby brother was born (now 15 years old). My dad is also has depression and dipolar.

My childhood is filled with no happy memories of my father, only those of being in a dressing gown on a cold winters night when we would drive around for hours looking for my dad only to find him in a pub, police station, or hospital beaten up.

Dad has been suicidal all his life and have lost count of the amount of times his wanted to kill himself even though he has a loving family.

I left home when I was 15 years old to escape the sad depressing lifestyle that I had at home, an older sister who was also suicidal (inherited bipolar from my dad) and mother who was mean, abusive and took her anger out on myself as a teenager.

Long story short, I'm now 23, my dad lives at home with my Mum/sister/brother in another state and I'm in Queensland with my future husband.

Dad goes through periods where he is sober for 6 months then disappears on a bender for a week at a time taking drugs, speed, etc gets beaten up then arrives back home a few weeks later.. his in a depressive state for weeks following then improves and does the same thing all over again.

His been given everything to try and make him 'happy', cars (his passion) a baby son, etc but nothing helps.

How long will this go on for? My dads in his 50's now and still acting like an 18 year old.. he was drinking in a car park all by himself last night until the early hours of the morning.. he doesn?t understand alcohol makes his depression worse, he hears voices and gets himself in trouble when ever his drunk.

Its painful to see my little brother live through what I did, seeing you dad come home with a broken nose/black eyes from more pub fights and worrying about him being suicidal constantly. Then you?re mum constantly crying because she cant cope.

I love my dad. When his sober (and takes his medication) his fantastic, kind, gentle, caring, generous, funny, just a fantastic guy.. but when my dads a drunk it causes so much pain.. I don?t know how much more my mum can take.. she tries to kick him out or send him to rehab (for the 20th time) but then he says he will kill himself.

What can I do? I know nothing can change until he helps himself, but what do I do, sit back and watch him drink until his death?

We have tried holidays, medication, rehab, talking to him, letters... nothing works for more than a few months... I feel so disappointed all over again...

:c004:

Any my poor brother.. growing up living with all of this..

K.

I am new to this site and could use some help and advice...My son has been dealing with drug and alcohol abuse for several years now (he is 19). I have always made excuses for him, tried to help him, really, just trying to find the thin line between being a good Mom and an enabler. I moved him out of state with me (along with a husband and 13 yr old brother) to give him a fresh start. Since then he has been in four rehabs. He just called me tonight to tell me he has been kicked out of the present one for using diet pills. In the beginning, I would run to him and comfort him when he relapsed, but the past few months I have resisted the urge and have let him find his own way. My ex husband signs the checks for rehab (guilt, alcoholic himself). I know he needs to be responsible for his own choices, so why does it upset me so much when he calls to tell me he has failed again. I also cannot talk to my husband, he feels like my son is worthless, habitual, and will never change, wants to write him off. I need help, I enabled my ex, I enabled my son, now I feel like I am enabling my present husband because he is making me feel wrong for wanting to help my son.

I have been reading a lot of posts lately about the effects long term alcohol abuse has on our brain, liver, and nervous system. I am getting really freaked out!!!! One post in particular about a girl who died at the age of 22. I am 23 and I was a weekend binge-drinker from the age of 18-21 and then more frequently for the past 2 years. Three-four nights a week going out and drinking a bunch of drinks and ending up hungover. Anyway, how long does it take for damage from alcohol to occur in the brain and liver? What are some signs to look out for. I read about people on this site who said they were all-day every day drinkers for 5+ years and then other posts about people who seem to drink heavily every night for two-three years and end up dying! I don't intend to drink again but right now i am worried that i may have done severe damage to my liver/brain/whatver.

Sorry if this post is a repeat from others in the past...but any insight on how your health improved or deteriorated after quitting would be helpful. Also, I know Ill probably get a few comments to go to the doctor, but i cant face that quite yet :cries3:

Soberrecovery is a forum for those recovering from alcohol and substance abuse addictions and help for family and friends whos lives have been affected by someone else's addiction. Although we care about everyone and all the issues our members struggle with we feel that some topics can cause damage to those who are trying to recover on our forums. Posts with suicidal, sexual abuse, and sexual addiction content are too much of a trigger for some of our members and can trigger a relapse in recovery.

We can't be all things to all people, but we want you to find the help you need. I found support forums that address these issues and would like to post the links. I have not read the recent posts on these forums so please join with caution after researching the sites yourself.

Pandora's Aquarium, an online support group, message board, and chat room for survivors rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse.

Pandora's Aquarium - message board and chat room for rape and sexual abuse survivors

Sex Addicts Anonymous

Sex Addicts Anonymous

SAA Electronic Meetings

#SLAA Online Group of Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous - Forum Message Boards

Shalom!

I've been waiting anxiously for a month to get my sister back into seeing the doctor/therapist she's had some success with in the past. She had a long history of irresponsible living and drug abuse that built up to 2 arrests within a month last December for faking prescriptions for percs and oxy. She made some progress in recovery for the first half of this year, but fell back into the old habits over the summer. All this time she's had a live-in bf (with previous alcohol problem) who's stood by her but whose patience is nearly at an end. And 2 weeks ago she found out she's pregnant. It all seemed ready to blow.

So Monday I go with her back to seeing the doctor. It'll be weekly visits from now on with me coming to all of them. They discuss both her treatments and what's in store if she keeps the baby (as she seems determined to do). I leave feeling hopeful that maybe her relapse can be turned around, the bf's fears eased, and maybe, just maybe, having a baby in all this won't be a total disaster.

Well. The next night at 3am I get a frantic call from her that the bf has come home drunk out his head and is trashing the place and screaming at her about all the the bad things she's done over the months. Cops take him away and now he's got to live in a different city with his mother who posted his bond. At the moment she's alone, except for me checking in and friends.

Then today we found our dad's chemo is no longer working and won't be continued. Not sure how much longer he's got, but whether he'll be around to see her baby born is in doubt.

All these things are connected. The BF's relapse in alcohol abuse by his frustrations with her, her fears over whether he'll stay and our dad's health making her own recover harder, the pregnancy thrown in which makes him feel trapped now, and her fears of being abandoned. One big knot to unravel!

While at times I've been sick with worry this week about where this is going and why it all hit at once, I'm hoping that maybe after the shocks are over, and time goes on some good could come of it. He's required to get alcoholism treatment now (and I know he will), she has continued to make her therapy appointments with me as the moral support, and knowing a baby is on the way and our dad's time could be short seems to be focusing her mind on staying clean for those reasons.