Archive for the ‘Bad Girl’ tag
I am an escort and alcoholic
My, that sounds terrible even just typing it.
I have posted before about my fear of going back into AA. I was in AA for 42 days and then went back out for 5 months. Today I have 4 days and I am really excited about the future!
A lot of my fear has to do with the fact that I cannot be totally honest about who I am. I am also worried because my line of work is almost "required drinking". I searched the forum and can't find any info along the lines of my specific problem....
So....I am a high end escort/call girl. I started because of financial reasons, I am trying desperately to get out, but I have a child in need of financial resouces. I primarily do dinner dates and drinking is expected. I started a new business that has gone beyond my expectations and I expect to be out of the "business" in the next 90 days.
For now, I must do this to provide for my childs needs. The problems are:
1) I can't be honest in the rooms. Will this thwart by ability to overcome this problem? I am afraid to get a sponsor because I can't be totally honest with her.
2) Most of my clients prefer to drink Champagne or wine with me. I am learning to stay away from people, places and things but it is difficult as an escort.
My child will suffer if I quit escorting (earning money). Should I put sobriety on hold until I no longer need to escort? I have been telling my clients that I have eliminated alcohol in my diet but they want me to have "just a sip of Champagne" to start the evening. They have no idea that I am an alcoholic.
If I am anything, I am a wonderful mother. I am also a great friend, sister, daughter, business person and generally a great person. I am not a bad girl, I just happen to have some problems that seem to have no solution.
Please advise.
Thanks!
I have posted before about my fear of going back into AA. I was in AA for 42 days and then went back out for 5 months. Today I have 4 days and I am really excited about the future!
A lot of my fear has to do with the fact that I cannot be totally honest about who I am. I am also worried because my line of work is almost "required drinking". I searched the forum and can't find any info along the lines of my specific problem....
So....I am a high end escort/call girl. I started because of financial reasons, I am trying desperately to get out, but I have a child in need of financial resouces. I primarily do dinner dates and drinking is expected. I started a new business that has gone beyond my expectations and I expect to be out of the "business" in the next 90 days.
For now, I must do this to provide for my childs needs. The problems are:
1) I can't be honest in the rooms. Will this thwart by ability to overcome this problem? I am afraid to get a sponsor because I can't be totally honest with her.
2) Most of my clients prefer to drink Champagne or wine with me. I am learning to stay away from people, places and things but it is difficult as an escort.
My child will suffer if I quit escorting (earning money). Should I put sobriety on hold until I no longer need to escort? I have been telling my clients that I have eliminated alcohol in my diet but they want me to have "just a sip of Champagne" to start the evening. They have no idea that I am an alcoholic.
If I am anything, I am a wonderful mother. I am also a great friend, sister, daughter, business person and generally a great person. I am not a bad girl, I just happen to have some problems that seem to have no solution.
Please advise.
Thanks!
Oh Bolloc*s! Overconfidence.
Hey gents.
Thought it best to post in here though things are moving quickly and I could use some advice pretty sharpish. We tend to be a bit leisurely in our posting in the Men's Room.
I'm 58 days sober, have only toked on a passing spliff twice (which does NOT affect my recovery) and though it's been a rollercoaster, as it is for everyone, the trend has been definitely upwards. Perhaps too much recently.
I promised myself I'd not date for a year, knowing from experience, that my head's gonna be puggled for that long.
A couple of days ago I found myself checking out a dating site and before I'd paused for thought I'd created a profile, thinking, quite rightly, that a little, sober, flirting practice would be a grand idea for when I'm ready to venture back out.
Well as with much in my life so far, I've found the whole thing addictive, especially now the ladies are so forthcoming with their positive reactions, which I wasn't expecting at all, not realising the numbers game that is at work on these sites.
The only boundaries I've set publically are, no casual sex and that I'm a non drinker. That's not stopped the flirting though, I always used drugs and alcohol to overcome my built in shyness, the net gives me time to compose myself and unleash the charm, I've found that, to my surprise and to the great benefit of my self esteem and I'm not boasting, I'm one charming ******* behind a 'puter screen.
So I've just spent most of the night, in a mutual apprieciation society typing away to a delightful, pill popping, party girl,on this site.
We're swapping numbers tomorrow, this is gonna go somewhere (she only lives 10 mile away).
She's just the kind of bad girl that has always floated my boat. I've told her I don't drink and why. (not all the gory details of course). We've swapped drug stories and 'tipped winks' about them. I'm an alcohol addict, no other substance has been compulsive for me and I've taken a very large, varied amount.
Oh and now I'm getting interest from other girls I'd honestly consider outta my league. My ethics in this area are untried. I've never been a cheater by nature, I grew out of it after my teens.
WTF, I'm awash with testosterone. I know myself and I'm not gonna get talked out of this new exciting land of opportunity but has anyone been in a similar situation?. Any tips? Cautions? If I start believing I'm outta my depth I'll jinx myself
Cheers, Jig
Thought it best to post in here though things are moving quickly and I could use some advice pretty sharpish. We tend to be a bit leisurely in our posting in the Men's Room.
I'm 58 days sober, have only toked on a passing spliff twice (which does NOT affect my recovery) and though it's been a rollercoaster, as it is for everyone, the trend has been definitely upwards. Perhaps too much recently.
I promised myself I'd not date for a year, knowing from experience, that my head's gonna be puggled for that long.
A couple of days ago I found myself checking out a dating site and before I'd paused for thought I'd created a profile, thinking, quite rightly, that a little, sober, flirting practice would be a grand idea for when I'm ready to venture back out.
Well as with much in my life so far, I've found the whole thing addictive, especially now the ladies are so forthcoming with their positive reactions, which I wasn't expecting at all, not realising the numbers game that is at work on these sites.
The only boundaries I've set publically are, no casual sex and that I'm a non drinker. That's not stopped the flirting though, I always used drugs and alcohol to overcome my built in shyness, the net gives me time to compose myself and unleash the charm, I've found that, to my surprise and to the great benefit of my self esteem and I'm not boasting, I'm one charming ******* behind a 'puter screen.
So I've just spent most of the night, in a mutual apprieciation society typing away to a delightful, pill popping, party girl,on this site.
We're swapping numbers tomorrow, this is gonna go somewhere (she only lives 10 mile away).
She's just the kind of bad girl that has always floated my boat. I've told her I don't drink and why. (not all the gory details of course). We've swapped drug stories and 'tipped winks' about them. I'm an alcohol addict, no other substance has been compulsive for me and I've taken a very large, varied amount.
Oh and now I'm getting interest from other girls I'd honestly consider outta my league. My ethics in this area are untried. I've never been a cheater by nature, I grew out of it after my teens.
WTF, I'm awash with testosterone. I know myself and I'm not gonna get talked out of this new exciting land of opportunity but has anyone been in a similar situation?. Any tips? Cautions? If I start believing I'm outta my depth I'll jinx myself
Cheers, Jig
