Drug Rehab Options Blog

Hello! I am new to the this forum but have searched it for advice in the past and have been lurking for the past month. I am off of Oxycontin for a month now, started cold turkey and then have been on Suboxone for about two weeks

I am also on:

Adderall
Klonopin
Zoloft

and have just started

Lunesta and Sonata

Just wondering what other people's experiences are with these drugs and recovery. Just a quick note to get started is what this is, really! Trouble with insomnia and depression (look at the meds). Things have been rocky so far, especially with the holidays, but I have not relapsed and the Sub is managing things very well! I have a great doctor and other people I am working with, but I decided not to go the inpatient route for a number of reasons, chief among them are privacy and not wanting my life disrupted any more than it has to be.

So I guess I am looking for some support here, support that would be kind of akin to what "group" meetings are about, in that I would hear from people who have had similar experiences. I am eager to get involved and offer what experience and help I can. Hope you guys are as welcoming as the board seems!

My first question is about the drugs I am currently on, I can post dosages in a later thread if it would help, and I know it may seem unusual but they are all scripted from one doc...I know some won't prescribe benzo's or adderall or others to someone who is coming off an addiction but I'm only taking whats scripted for me.

posternutbag

Hey guys, hope everyone is haveing a beautiful day!!

Quick question,

Everytime I click on the "thanks" button on the bottom of a members response -

It does eventually put my name on the bottom, but first what comes up, is an error message saying that I don't have access to edit the page or that my account may not have access to that.... etc.

I then have to click out of that screen, go back to the begining of the forums site, go back under the family and friend, then back to the thread again, click "thanks" on the next one and do that whole process all over-

Am I doing something wrong??

Sometimes, I don't say "thanks" because it is soooo time consuming to go back into the begininng every time.

Thanks,

Cessy

Hey You

Yeah, you in the cask,
I'm talkin' to you and you'd better listen,
I thought you were my friend, but you screwed me over.

You lied and cheated me out of four years of my life.

You made me believe you would help me with my problems and pain,
but you just made them so much worse.

You turned me into someone I didn't know and didn't even like.

But now "I am in charge" and I have sent you away,
and now you're gone I am begining to know the real me again....
the me that I like.

So don't you ever come knocking at my door again....

You are NOT welcome here.

Hello everyone,

I'm not sure where to start so I'll start at the begining

I met my fiance 4 years ago through a mutual friend. When we first met we both smoked pot and drank heavily. Eventually I grew tired of the partying and started living a much more moderate lifestyle. The transition has not been as easy for my fiance.

He has unsecessfully tried to quit smoking pot twice. Both times he had severe mood swings which lasted for weeks at a time and would drink excessively. After 3 or 4 months of not smoking up he would start smoking again. I have been supportive through these attempts and recognize that he doesn't want to live like this forever, he promised that he would give it up before the wedding. He has, however, made it clear that he really does like smoking pot as it helps him relax and he likes getting high.

We are now 5 months away from our wedding and I am getting more and more anxious as the weeks pass. I am no longer happy living like this and recognize that I can't control his use. The only thing I can control is whether I remain in this relationship and get married to an addict. Last weekend I told him that if he doesn't seek outside help for this that I will not marry him in April. I gave him one week to make up his mind and provided him with some contact information for different counsellors near our home.

He has made it clear that he doesn't intend on ever seeking professional help for his problems. He has set a quit date, which is December 11, but to be honest I just don't feel like this is good enough for me. I keep hoping that he will change his mind but at the same time I know he doesn't take me seriously when I say that I'll cancel the wedding. I don't blame him, there has been times where I have put my foot down only to change my mind later.

I feel like I am being cruel by threatening him. I don't know what else to do, I love him so much but refuse to cater to his disease for any longer. This morning while talking on the phone he said he is willing to come a compromise but I don't know what an acceptable compromise would look like. I don't want to feel like I'm cheating myself out of a good marraige by letting him get his way once again.

I just feel lost, lonely and scared... I don't know what to do or where to start.

Any thoughts or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you,

First off I am new to the forum. I found it while researching onliine.

Its 06:45am...and the begining of a new day. I have been drinking way too much for approx 6 years. I has affected my personal life and current relationship. Has not affected my career that much yet.(thank goodness)....but I can see problems down the road if this continues.
Now with a new born at home, and a wife I dont want to lose. Our relationship has suffered because of the alcohol.....

Today is going to be my DAY 1!!!

I have tried in the past but only made it about day 4-5. I have to make this attempt different than the others!!! This one HAS to work.
I started out having a couple beer every night after work to relax from my stressfull career. Now it has turned out to a minimum of 4 up to 8. I am not sleeping properly and my mood has changed dramatically in the last year to miserable.
Today is different....Today has to be different!!!

Thank you to all who have posted on this forum. After reading for a few days it has inspired me to change my life.

I will post to let everyone know how I am doing. Hopefully everything goes well!!!!!

I am a complete failure in every aspect of my life. I thought i was always there for everybody in my family but all im hearing now is how bad i am, the two people (my mother and AH) i love more than anything in this world are stripping away who i am bit by bit, im not good enough for either one of them, i cant live up to their expectations of what i should be or what i should do

im having my baby tomorrow, i go in for my c-section early in the morning, it should be the happiest time of my life right? this is the absolutely worst time of my life, i cant even enjoy having my baby because of the selfishness of my family

i asked my dad last night if he was gonna be in the operating room with me, he said no he couldnt do it, he couldnt stand to see me have surgery, well my mom has told me from the begining she couldnt be there and watch it, so im like ok im not going by myself, well my dad was the only one home but i remembered my mom saying she couldnt do it either so i went to my husbands apartment and asked him to be in the room with me, it was the first excitement ive seen from him about the baby, but i coudlnt stay and talk to him because his "friend" was coming over, he says they are just friends now and shes helping him get back to alabama, hes told me over and over they arent sleeping together anymore so i said ok, ill come by tomorrow and stay the night then we'll go to the hospital together from your apartment, he hugged and kissed me and said he loved me and i left, i was on the top of the world, i know the horrible things hes done but i so badly wanted it to be his face i was looking into when i had the surgery

i get home and my mom wont even speak to me, she finally says you knew i would have been there, i said you and daddy both told me you couldnt be there, whats the big deal, i said maybe my husband seeing his baby born will click in his head and he will get straight, who knows, i said hes still going back to alabama, i still cant be with him drinking as much as he does now, i said you get the baby all the time but this is his only chance and maybe it will make him see what he has to lose if he continues down this path, i was just dumbfounded that she was acting like this, shes been coming down on me all week, just a few days before she told me she wasnt going to feel guilty anymore , i said guilty about what? she said how you turned out, how do you say that to your child, i said what am i doing, i know im not perfect, im not the only person caught in the cycle with a alcoholic, me and her have been fighting all week, i never knew how selfish she was, i said over and over how this is my pregnancy and this is about me and what im about to go through, im the one getting sliced open, so eventually we ended up screaming at each other
so i write a letter to my husband in case his "friend" is still there, i make up my mind if shes still there and i think they are sleeping together then ill tell him he cant be there, well i go by there after midnight and her car is still there and all the lights are off in his apartment, so i pretty much got the picture of what he was doing, so i left the letter, which basically said i wasnt going to be second to anyone else, if he couldnt put me and my child first then i was done, that he coudlnt be in the hospital, i was sorry i even asked him and i left, i was only there like 25seconds, well i have a voicemail from him this morning, hes totally p*ssed, he said i dont appreciate being watched, you knew she was there, dont hurt me like this, come by tonight, i love you, i just deleted it, he didnt even try to deny sleeping with her, and i cant be second anymore, my child deserves better

i get home last night from leaving the letter and i figure now my mom would let up cause he wouldnt be at the hospital , she was even more pissed cause i had left in the middle of the night, i said im 25 i dont need permission, i took my own car, what is the big deal, hes not going to be there so why are you still pissed, so then shes like well you better tell him he can cause im not going to be there, i totally snap, i told her she was so f*cking selfish, this has nothing to do with anyone but me, why is everyone making it about themselves, i begged her to quit trying to control me, but she turns everything around on me and now says she didnt say the things to me that i remember, im like do you have mental problems it was five seconds ago you said that to me, but she denies it, so now shes whining to my sister about how mean im being to her and how i wont sit and talk to her anymore all i do is yell and scream

and all i do is yell and scream because ive asked her over and over to leave me alone, i dont need the stress, i said your gonna cause me to go into labour, i finally had enough, im so tired of her and my husband telling me how bad i am, if it wasnt for my baby i would just give up, how can these two people not see what they are doing to me, if my mom helps me it always comes with a price, i have to do things her way or no way, hes not going to be there yet shes still p*ssed at me, i dont have the money to get the rest of the stuff i need for the hospital, i dont have gas in my car to get there, ive told her she coudlnt be at the hospital , her or my husband both of them can stay away from me, i dont need that stress

and despite the lies and cheating and everything my husband has done, i cant help but hate myself, he will never forgive me for this, now he really does have a reason to hate me, and blame me, and theres nothing i can do, it was absolutely the cruelest thing in the world to tell him he could be there and then take it away, and i know he hasnt shown any interest in the baby or me, that only because his life is falling apart does he talk about us being together , i cant do anything about what hes done to me, he has to live with that, but now i have to live with this and the guilt is driving me insane, ill never be able to face him again, i dont expect him to ever forgive me, its kinda ironic that this is what finally split us up for good cause i could never go back, i can never look into his eyes again, he may be an alcoholic and put me through more h*ll than anybody in the world, he lied last night and slept with that girl, but i never truly thought i did anything so horrible to him that he could hate me, until now, and ill never speak with him again, im so embarrassed

no matter what i do they are both mad at me, i cant make etiher one of them happy, both have turned the situation around on me and now im the bad guy, im never good enough for anyone, now im gonna end up in that delievery room by myself, im sure my mom in the end would be there, but now i have so much resentment for her that i dont want her in there, i truly want my husband there but its not going to happen, i cant get the family i so badly want no matter what, and i cant let him be around my son when he refuses to give up a woman that hes not even really with, i was so stupid for believing him, yet i still feel guilty, i wish i would have never asked him, and i cant wrap my mind around my mom, how she can be so selfish and controlling, i never seen that, she acts like this baby is hers or something, yet she denies all this, im the one causing all this, i cant be perfect for either of them

this is what im bringing my baby into, i love him more than anything, but i really shoudnt have had him, its my own fault for bringing him into a life like this, with a father like he has

i am so completely unhappy and i cant get out of the surgery tomorrow so i dont know what to do, ive never been this low before in my life

Hello, I am Nathan.

I think I have a drinking problem, I drink everyday, at work, in the morning, ect.


I dont even know why anymore... I've been using my mother's lupus as a excuse as she is begining to die a little more everyday (Her heart, lungs and kidneys are being attacked, lots of fluid around them, surgerys, and she is on oxygen at the house).

To top it off, I am Bipolar, class 1. Meaning I am on selexa, and seroquel... I dont know if the spelling on those is right *shrug*... I just dont know.

I seem to drink everyday with total disreguard for the consequence. I know I need to stop, but I still continue. I just dont know what to do, I feel lost.

I guess this is a plea for help, I dont know what to do anymore. I keep drinking... I'd Hate to see what my family would say if they caught wind, I just dont know...

NRL2202

will you ever know how much i loved you.
In the begining so much love and joy so many plans
You told me I was your everything and I believed
The touch of your hand a kiss from your lips
We were both two lonley souls when we met
Funny thing is things do not last
Before I knew it things began to change
You would be tipsy with drink no big deal only a couple of beers
Before I knew it I saw the real you hidden bottles all over the house
The smell of booze a horrible stench
Your mad rages at me I trembling tiptoeing around you
Calling me vile names when you said you loved me
stumbling around acting a fool lying for you not wanting anyone to know
The sickness afterwards throwing up shaking like a leaf sleeping for days
Then the sober you would reapear never wanting to discuss what had happened
I was foolish I always stayed he will do better I would say I am his everything
Finally the day came when I knew I was not your everything
I had to let you go for my own sanity I really do not know you
You have your bottle all to yourself she is really your everything
You broke my heart you are a broken man but I am powerless
I can not fix you I tried but that is up to you
I cry for what could have been what should have been
I remember the man I first met and those first happy months
Now you are just a drunk all alone I cry for you and your pitful life
I am starting a new life but in my heart you will always be.
If only to many what ifs
May you find your peace someday

My addicted niece is in jail again. She's been in this time for 30 days awaiting the judge's decision (this Wendesday) about what will happen to her.

(for those who don't know the story - niece on meth, used and sold, has one first degree and one second degree felony possession. Was given probation, a little time on work release, treatment and counseling - and a year later she gets pulled over for fleeing an officer and we find she never stopped using or selling - even while on court supervision)

Her p.o. tells me she will get at least 8 months in the workhouse (staight time), and extensive supervision, treatment, counseling, etc. after that.

She hasn't had time for family in the past - doesn't call, doesn't honor commitments, etc. Occassionally she would stop by my place to visit, but usually because she needed something. So now that she's in jail, she's everybody's friend. She's calling me, her mom, all her aunts in another state, old boyfriends, the lot. I know this because they call me to find out what is up.

When she calls from jail, it costs everyone money becuase she has to call collect. I've taken a few of her calls, but every time I talk with her, I feel depressed. Her old boyfriend refused the call and some of my family doesn't pick up anymore because it is very expensive to call collect from jail long distance.

In the begining she was talking very crazy (thought my dead father was in the car with her, etc.). Now she's a bit more coherent, but she thinks the lawyer her meth-addicted boyfriend got her is going to get her out of both this problem and get her felonies erased (there is no way that will happen, I think she's just trying to convince herself of it to avoid reality).

So, Here's my question. Is it enabling to talk to her from jail? Part of me feels bad that she's in there - actually, I'm shocked, devastated and heart-broken about it. Another part of me thinks that if she can't reach anyone, she'll have to sit in jail and think about what she's done.

Last time she was in jail, I visited, put money on her "books" (thats putting money in an account so she can get magazines, candy bars, etc. while in there). This time, I'm not doing any of that. I decided it wasn't worth it to give up my yoga classes (they conflict with visiting hours) or waste my time standing in line for hours to see her for 15 minutes. I do feel a little bad about not visiting her... so I've been taking her calls so far. At the same time, all the calls are just about her rambling on about a million things, most of which have to do with minimizing the likely consequences she's facing.

Any perspective anyone has to offer would be greatly appreciated.

thanks...