Drug Rehab Options Blog

I quit drinking just after Christmas. CHristmas was a big drinking day

Boxing day I had 6 whiskeys
27th - I had 4 whiskeys
28th I had 2 whiskeys

Then I stopped

So far I've been going pretty well. Christmas day is 2 weeks tomorrow so I am getting close to my longest ever stint without alcohol (well since I started anyway).

I've been sleeping fine. In fact - I am sleeping full nights and still struggling to wake up in the morning. While I was on leave I was sleeping up to 14 hours a day. Now that I have work again this is causing me problems. I can't get enough sleep.

I am also *so* depressed. I already take antisdepressants and have for 5.5 years. Is this depression normal? It's so serious it is preventing me from working - which is in turn adding to my stress levels as things get behind.

What do people normally do in this situation? Does this last a long time or a short time?

so way back when my 2nd husband and i married, after many years together as a couple, one year for christmas i decided it was time for us to start NEW traditions, our own family traditions....so i went with the bow/ribbon thing for tree decorations....cute checkered and striped bows, that each had to be hand tied to the tree. i still have a photo of my daughter and i in front of the "first" tree......

so bows became a tradition......til the year that we'd stored the decorations in boxes in the attic and they got all hot and moist and mildewed. so that christmas i announced i was not gonna do bows.....well my daughter took that as a mortal blow....but mooooo'm i luuuuuvvvv the boooooowwwzzzzzz.....so off i went to get MORE damn bows, each that had to be hand tied on the tree.

my daughter is 25 now....iives on her own, has her own tree, i've moved a few times in the past few years, but faithfully drag the damn bows with me. so i did bows again this year, the kind you have to hand tie on individuallly, cuz renee was coming over for an early christmas and god forbid i don't have BOWS.

i called renee today, we hadn't spoken in a few days, just traded some emails and i missed her voice and we somehow got on the subject of THE BOWS....and she said mom, you can quit the bow thing now...they aren't the same, so they've lost their meaning.......

this means i have FOR YEARS, a decade at least, kept the bow tradition alive cuz I thought they held meaning for her.....and god forbid i disappoint my kid or ruin christmas....

so when i take down the tree i'm disposing of the stupid bows (if i ever get all the damn bows off the tree) and NEXT christmas i get to start a NEW tradition and do the tree exactly the way I want....

December led me straight into the bottle after almost having 30 days. Actually my addiction did. I don't know what happened, it happened so fast and before I knew it I was on a downhill spiral that led to a near overdose... twice. I had letters written of when I'm gone and my body was giving out. I woke up though. Hated waking up. Had to drink and drink to not feel or think but the thoughts kept coming.

Don't know how all this happened. Was working a ligit job, my massage business was taking off, presents were bought, Christmas was in the air and then I picked up and it was all over. Was able to maintain for a Christmas celebration on the 23rd and worked the next two days, then I was off and running, shutting my phones off, quitting my job and getting beligerent to the point of babbling. My heart feels an emptiness, no not really. It is filled with that tremendous feeling of failure, pain and horrific despair. This is my first day with no alcohol and the pills have been emptied.

I need help and don't know where to reach out except here for now. Please lend some support and understanding cuz I know most of you have been there.

Thank you!
Nickishine:a108:

So Grateful...
Today has been one of the most amazing days of my recovery thus far. I had to go to court today about my children and it went better than I could have ever imagined!! I have only been clean for 2 months, and I got my children taken away during my active addiction in May 2008. The court granted me an improvement period that was only to last for 6 months (ended 12/29/08), but I screwed around and couldn't pass drug tests , just wasn't doing the things that I needed to do until November. I finally got myself together, went to detox, then to a long term facility, which everybody thought was in my best interest because I was addicted to heroin. I stayed in the program for about 3 weeks, but I couldn't take it there anymore, so I left. Well, the 'powers that be' weren't too pleased with that, so they petitioned the judge and he signed an order stating that I had to be in long term facility the week before Christmas. Needless to say I couldn't find an inpatient program with a bed available between then and now, so I was in contempt of court. I have been staying clean, passing drug screens, going to meetings, and doing outpatient therapy during this time though. I was a bundle of nerves when I went into court today- my lawyer informed me that they were moving to set the case for disposition and terminate my parental rights. Not what I wanted to hear. So we went in, my lawyer presented everything that had been going on in my life and that I was doing well and working a program, everybody else put their two-cents in about how bad I was, and then the judge spoke...
The first thing he said was that he was very suprised to see me infront of him sober and with clean drug screens under my belt. Then he spoke to those that pointed out my failures- he said that I was apparently doing something right and just because I did not follow the path that the MDT wanted me to and of the order he had signed I had obviously chosen a good path that worked for me and was sticking to it. He went on to say that he was not going to make me go into an inpatient program or terminate my rights, but he was going to schedule another hearing in 30 days to see if I was actually going to be able to remain clean and sober. :c029:
This was definitely a God-thing and that's all I can attribute it to. I know that I must continue doing the things I have been in order to maintain my cleanliness, and I believe that with my HP's (whom I chose to call God) help I can definitely be successful. I am so grateful for the divine favor that was bestowed upon me today and I don't think that I have the capacity to fully express this. I believe that the only thing that I can do is keep on truckin' and show through my actions that I have truely become new.
Thanks for letting me share!

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*That's just my opinion, but I could be wrong.*

Such a minor thing, but I was wondering why my avatars no longer have animation? At Christmas I had lights that flickered, no problem - but I've tried to add a couple of new avatars that had animation and they were added, but without movement. Just wondering - thanks!

Well, I joined this group yesterday in hopes of getting some understanding of what is happening in our family. My freshman in college came home from college for Christmas break and after a week we found coke and xanax in her bag (we also found a handle of vodka after she left). We confronted her, and at first she shrugged it off, but 5 minutes into the conversation she broke down and told us she needed help. She knew she had a problem as she even gave me a name of a treatment center she would like to go to. When our conversation ended I called the center, they had an opening and instructed us to act quickly. I stayed up all night researching treatment centers to see if this one would be the right fit for her. We decided to send her where she wanted to go. She spent 6 nights in detox before she was moved to the treatment center. She has been in treatment since December 23rd. I know we did the right thing...but here is where the family is torn. How do we know if she is actually and addict/ alcoholic or if she is a kid who just spiraled out of control during her first semester away at college? My other daughter wants her to come live with her at her college (she is a grad student) but she is under the impression that she will be able to drink again...she just neds to know her limits. I know she feels this way because her dad and I have not felt she is an addict/alcoholic, just a kid that is self medicating because we have felt she has some underlying psych problems. I know that anyone that goes into trmt is lead to believe they are an addict, but I know people that were in trmt for drugs that are able to socially drink. I am just so concerned wht we will do once she finishes treament. We plan on sending her to a sober house...but her future scares me to death. Unfortunately 18 yr olds seem to focus on drugs and drinking for their social life. Thanks for listening. Any thoughts would be appreciated.

SORRY ABOUT THAT :(


YouTube - the only funny fedex commercial ever

My Christmas holiday from work ended yesterday. I was off for almost 10 whole days, the most time I've had off by far in my recovery, and I spent a lot of the time focused on getting my program in gear.

My b/f introduced me to some really fantastic women in his network this season, and I finally connected enough with one of them to ask her to be my sponsor over lunch yesterday. She agreed! I'm psyched!

I did a lot more soul-searching and checking (and even some interviewing) this time before I asked her. She has some years clean, is working the steps for a third time, has a wonderful sponsor that I really respect, a solid network, and a recovering husband as well. She is active in the fellowship. We are also around the same age and both have careers and kids, so a lot in common.

She and I are taking a road trip to a convention next week to bond, so I'm really excited about that. My first time at a convention.

I'm glad I took my time in finding a new sponsor this time. It may be that there is a reason it took me a while to find her. The wait has been worth it, and I feel more ready than ever to begin formal step work now.

And, I get my nine month key tag tomorrow!!!
:Xmaselfb
KJ

I did it again. He called needing money two days before Christmas. He begged and manipulated and made me feel guilty and so on. I wired him money to put a down payment on his own apartment. We are not together but I still love him and want to be with him. I live 5 hours away and still in school. He just graduated, found a job and now living on his own. If I didnt help him, he would still be living with his parents. A big part of me wants to see if he can make it own his own. He chooses to still smoke pot as often as he can. He states he used to do it to get away from his problems but now he does it bc he likes it? We had a good talk on the phone for 2o minutes that night and he wants me to come see him soon. 5 days later after not hearing from him I text messaged him asking how he was doing? I got no response. I text him New Years Ever and New Years Day. He finally text me back and said he would call me later and never did. Yesterday, I kept calling and texting him and he finally answered upset telling me that we aren't together and that I need to quit acting like we are in a relationship. He says he wants to see me and wants me to come down later. I asked when and he said he would call me. He rushed off the phone saying he was busy and was getting everything in his new apartment, thanks to me. Why do I do this to myself? Why do I keep longing for someone that obviously is just using me? Why can't I stop? When will I hit my rock bottom with him? I am broke. Did I enable him? A part of me thinks he will be needing and wanting money again? Do you think so? Will I be strong enough to say No? Why can't I let go. This has been going on for almost 5 years now. I hate myself for it sometimes and then other times I am happy for helping him. I am so confused. I can't function. I feel my heart aching and stay in my room all day. I don't feel like doing anything anymore.

Hi all.I had been sober for over a year when during the summer I started on lexapro for anxiety and panic.

Then stupidly bought 1mg xanax and 10 mg valium over the internet and have been taking them daily.I then went drinking over christmas and went on a mad binge new years eve with all my xanax and valium gone.

I have had terrible panic and anxiety for the past few days and went to the hospital for help today.
The doctor prescribed me 2 10mg librium every four hours but it doesnt really seem to be taking the edge off.
He only gave me enough until Monday and told me to see my GP.

I really feel I need to take something else as I took three librium just to try and calm down for a while.And what he prescribed wont last till monday if i keep taking three.

I really dont know how ill manage till monday on what he gave me as its seems im withdrawing from xanax valium and alcohol at the same time.

should i take the extra librium as i really need them or what?
Anyone have any advice please help as Im in the horrors here.
I will NEVER drink again after this episode and i was doing so well and now have three witdrawals at once.
any advice???