Archive for the ‘Day Care’ tag
Feeling disconnected from life!
Good Morning all... Just wanted to pop in and say hi! I haven't been posting much the last few days and feel a little disconnected from here... from life!
Today is... ah... hold on let me count... 19 days for me. I'm very proud of myself thus far... but I'm just not feeling right. In the mornings I feel my best, but as the day goes on I start to feel sluggish and tired. Once I pick up my son from day-care and we go home, I don't want to do too much. I feel bad because I want time to go by fast so I can put my child to bed and then I can than crawl into bed myself. Most nights I am falling asleep by 9:00. Last night I made it to 9:30 *GASP* I know! I'm sure the time change has something to do with how tired I am so early. But I feel mentally drained.
The best part is looking forward to each sober day that I wake up. I still LOVE being sober and haven't had any cravings thus far... well I shouldn't say that... I haven't had any cravings that I wasn't able to control. I'm just not feeling myself and it's really friggin ANNOYING me!!!! Has this happened to anyone else?
Today is... ah... hold on let me count... 19 days for me. I'm very proud of myself thus far... but I'm just not feeling right. In the mornings I feel my best, but as the day goes on I start to feel sluggish and tired. Once I pick up my son from day-care and we go home, I don't want to do too much. I feel bad because I want time to go by fast so I can put my child to bed and then I can than crawl into bed myself. Most nights I am falling asleep by 9:00. Last night I made it to 9:30 *GASP* I know! I'm sure the time change has something to do with how tired I am so early. But I feel mentally drained.
The best part is looking forward to each sober day that I wake up. I still LOVE being sober and haven't had any cravings thus far... well I shouldn't say that... I haven't had any cravings that I wasn't able to control. I'm just not feeling myself and it's really friggin ANNOYING me!!!! Has this happened to anyone else?
Are all active alcoholics bums?
As some of you know, my ASO and I have been separated for 6 weeks now and we have a 9 month old daughter together.
Ever since we separated, he has rarely seen our daughter and is still driniking actively. He and I have an arrangement that he pays for day care. He helped out with the day care bill one week and has not pitched in since. Of course, we have not seen him since either. Now he is saying that he will give me enough for both weeks of day care that he was not around when he gets paid next week. He is supposedly in recovery since yesterday, yet he still does not have 24 hours of sobriety under his belt.
Anyway, I plan to officially file for child support if he does not follow through next week and begins to contribute every week going forward. I can get by without him, too, so sometimes I wonder if it is worth it to go through all the hassle or if I should just move on and accept him for the A/bum he is. However, a part of me thinks that it is only fair that he supports both his children as he does pay child support for his first daughter from a previous marriage already.
My A always took advantage of me even when we lived together because I let him do that. Although he is a functional A with a great job, he never paid rent or utilitites during the few years we were living together. He would buy the groceries most of the time and would pay for most of our entertaining bills (restaurants, outings, etc.), but what he spent never came close to what I spent on the house. His spending was always spontaneous. In other words, he could go out and buy something for the house and get a dress and/or a toy for our daughter, but it was only when he felt like it and was in the mood. He was never good with scheduled payments like rent, utilities, car payments, etc.
What are your thoughts on that? Have you had similar or different experiences with the A's in your life?
Ever since we separated, he has rarely seen our daughter and is still driniking actively. He and I have an arrangement that he pays for day care. He helped out with the day care bill one week and has not pitched in since. Of course, we have not seen him since either. Now he is saying that he will give me enough for both weeks of day care that he was not around when he gets paid next week. He is supposedly in recovery since yesterday, yet he still does not have 24 hours of sobriety under his belt.
Anyway, I plan to officially file for child support if he does not follow through next week and begins to contribute every week going forward. I can get by without him, too, so sometimes I wonder if it is worth it to go through all the hassle or if I should just move on and accept him for the A/bum he is. However, a part of me thinks that it is only fair that he supports both his children as he does pay child support for his first daughter from a previous marriage already.
My A always took advantage of me even when we lived together because I let him do that. Although he is a functional A with a great job, he never paid rent or utilitites during the few years we were living together. He would buy the groceries most of the time and would pay for most of our entertaining bills (restaurants, outings, etc.), but what he spent never came close to what I spent on the house. His spending was always spontaneous. In other words, he could go out and buy something for the house and get a dress and/or a toy for our daughter, but it was only when he felt like it and was in the mood. He was never good with scheduled payments like rent, utilities, car payments, etc.
What are your thoughts on that? Have you had similar or different experiences with the A's in your life?
Complicated
Hi.
I have a bit of a dilemma. My boyfriends has been divorced from his wife for 2 years. They have a 6 year old son-He's a great kid. They have joint custody-week on week off kind of an arrangement. We dont socialize with her but have friends and family that do.
Last summer the ex went to in patient rehab for a month-she was the typical party girl who drank too much too often and also went on coke binges. I think her addictions were more social than physical, although I recognize that can often been just as challenging. However while in rehab, she met a guy and when they "got out" she moved him in to her place right away. Everyone cautioned her against it but she didnt listen-it was true love and forever. He was in rehab for crack use.
Fast forward about 7 months. We find out that she and the new man have decided that smoking pot is ok. Now I beleive that people can use pot no probelm from time to time but if you are an addict you are an addict and that should be off limits. What bothered me then is that my boyfriend would pick up his son at her house and she would be high-I dont think its something that should be done with kids around, but at that point I didnt feel I had a place to say anything to him about the situation.
A couple of months later she announces she is pregnant. She continues to smoke pot too which I think is ridiculous (she apparently did during her first pregnancy too and drank). As far as everyone can tell, she hasnt done coke or had anything to drink though.
Last week we learned that her rehab boyfriend has relapsed and she kicked him out. She is 7 month pregnant. She has told people she will take him back if he stays clean between now and Christmas. She has also asked us if she can provide before and after school care every week for the 6 year old while she is on mat leave, isntead of us sending him to his day care which he has happily been attending the last few years). On my boyfriends custody weeks, we'd pick him up after work from her place-but he's be subjected to more of what goes on there.
We are very concerned about how having this guy come in and out of the 6 year olds life will affect him. How do we protect him when we dont have him at our house? How do we explain the situation, and that drugs are bad, when mom (and one set of grandparents as well) do them? We dont want to disrespect her to her son, but at the same time we want him to grow up understanding that some choices are bad.
There are so many what ifs in this situation and we feel like we cant really do anything. She hasnt done enough wrong where we feel we could easily go for full custody, yet what kind of example is she setting for her son? Its such a grey area!
I have a bit of a dilemma. My boyfriends has been divorced from his wife for 2 years. They have a 6 year old son-He's a great kid. They have joint custody-week on week off kind of an arrangement. We dont socialize with her but have friends and family that do.
Last summer the ex went to in patient rehab for a month-she was the typical party girl who drank too much too often and also went on coke binges. I think her addictions were more social than physical, although I recognize that can often been just as challenging. However while in rehab, she met a guy and when they "got out" she moved him in to her place right away. Everyone cautioned her against it but she didnt listen-it was true love and forever. He was in rehab for crack use.
Fast forward about 7 months. We find out that she and the new man have decided that smoking pot is ok. Now I beleive that people can use pot no probelm from time to time but if you are an addict you are an addict and that should be off limits. What bothered me then is that my boyfriend would pick up his son at her house and she would be high-I dont think its something that should be done with kids around, but at that point I didnt feel I had a place to say anything to him about the situation.
A couple of months later she announces she is pregnant. She continues to smoke pot too which I think is ridiculous (she apparently did during her first pregnancy too and drank). As far as everyone can tell, she hasnt done coke or had anything to drink though.
Last week we learned that her rehab boyfriend has relapsed and she kicked him out. She is 7 month pregnant. She has told people she will take him back if he stays clean between now and Christmas. She has also asked us if she can provide before and after school care every week for the 6 year old while she is on mat leave, isntead of us sending him to his day care which he has happily been attending the last few years). On my boyfriends custody weeks, we'd pick him up after work from her place-but he's be subjected to more of what goes on there.
We are very concerned about how having this guy come in and out of the 6 year olds life will affect him. How do we protect him when we dont have him at our house? How do we explain the situation, and that drugs are bad, when mom (and one set of grandparents as well) do them? We dont want to disrespect her to her son, but at the same time we want him to grow up understanding that some choices are bad.
There are so many what ifs in this situation and we feel like we cant really do anything. She hasnt done enough wrong where we feel we could easily go for full custody, yet what kind of example is she setting for her son? Its such a grey area!
