Drug Rehab Options Blog

The secret of life is to know when enough is enough.
- Dr. Vincent Ryan

This was my father's favorite saying in his final years, and one of the last thing he said to me before he died. I was contemplating selling my house and moving to a smaller one, and that was his pronouncement on the subject.

It was kind of ironic, since there he was, a family doctor for forty years, gasping and wheezing over the phone, barely able to speak, dying from smoking too much. But the fact that he learned the lesson late doesn't negate the truth. And it goes straight to the heart of the issue of gratitude; namely, that gratitude makes us feel like we have enough, whereas ingratitude leaves us in a state of deprivation in which we are always looking for something else.

That's why the idea of cultivating "the gratitude attitude" is so popular among twelve-step programs. As Emmet Miller notes in "Gratitude: A Way of Life". "Gratitude has to do with feeling full, complete, adequate - we have everything we need and deserve; we approach the world with a sense of value." Addictions of all sorts come from a sense of deprivation, a feeling of lack that the user believes can be filled with a substance or activity, whether it's drugs, shopping, alcohol or food. Caught up in lack, we feed the need but never feel truly satisfied because our substance of choice can't fill the lack. Consequently we continue to want more and more.

As many people have pointed out, our consumer society owes its very existence to its ability to fuel a sense of never being satisfied. If we were happy about the way we looked, for example, why would we spend billions on cosmetics and plastic surgery? Or on expensive cars that supposedly convey a certain image that we don't have?

An attitude of gratitude gets us off the treadmill and out of the rat race. As we cultivate a true and deep appreciation for what we do have, we realize that our sense of lack is, for the most part, an illusion. No matter our material circumstances, the richness of our soul is ultimately what brings happiness, not another Martini, bigger breasts, or the latest video game. In the words of Lao Tzu, "He who knows enough is enough will always have enough."
From the book "Attitudes of Gratitude" by M.J.Ryan, pages 73 and 74.
M.J.Ryan is the executive editor of Conari Press, publisher of the best-selling "Rainbow Acts of Kindness" series, and the editor of "A Gratteful Heart" and The Fabric of the Future". She lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her husband and daughter.

When AH got kicked out of rehab a month ago (for using while in rehab - some dimwit thought that it would be a good idea to sneak some in for himself and his "friends"), he started taking Suboxone when he got out of rehab. The suboxone was leftover from his family doctor. He had it rx'd when he'd tried to detox on his own before. He's taken Suboxone for about a month (I guess 2 a day??) and supposedly has been tapering down - he took his last one yesterday afternoon. Well he's out now and is very sick again. He said it's about as bad as being dopesick. So basically after entering rehab a month ago he had 8 days clean off of Oxy, he got kicked out of rehab for taking 2 percocet, came home still very sick, started taking Suboxone for about 25 days. Felt much better immediately while on Sub's, he took his last Suboxone yesterday afternoon, started getting sick last night and is very sick today. He said he's just going to try to tough it out.

Is this normal? To be this sick after supposedly a month off of Oxy and a month on Suboxone? Does Suboxone really delay withdrawals like that? How can that be - makes no sense to me how that works.

I am posting this per AH's request. (I know, I know - codie) But he doesn't have an account here. He's wondering what he can do to ease his sickness and how long to expect this to last. I told him gatorade and emergen-c (vitamin supplement with electrolytes) He said he doesn't have diarrhea. Thanks guys.

on whether he feels that AH is stable enough to have unsupervised visitations right now? AH had an appointment with our family doctor last week. I know that he can't tell me what AH said and that is fine. But based on his behaviors with the things that he has been saying and basically seeing the kids when it is convienent for him, I question whether he is stable enough. If it were up to me I would just ask for the supervised visitations. However, since I have only bad feelings and opinions for him and just about every word out of him mouth is something manipulative I don't even know what to believe from him.

So after all he said yesterday about telling his girlfriend that it isn't going to work, he apparently had a change of heart. He is going to stay with her. Ok what ever. I did tell him that he needs to tell me if he was "with" her before or after this last time we were together. He refused to answer me. I only wanted to know because I'm not one who is with just anyone and wasn't sure if I should be getting checked for anything if he is sleeping around. I feel I have the right to know, but he seems to think differently. Of course he had been drinking who knows how much during this discussion.


During the course of the conversation he also was telling me that over the last 6 years I have done nothing but make him feel like crap. Right now he claims he doesn't care if he lives or dies. I see this for the manipulation that it is. I know I have posted before about talking to our family doctor. While I understand what he says and does is his business and decisions, he will have every other weekend with the kids and various other visitation rights. I have already told the attorney drawing up our papers that I want the whole clause added about no drinking while caring for the kids. But I really want the doctors opinion on whether he feels he is stable enough to keep them. I have also told him that at any time if he feels that he needs me to come and get the kids I will do so. I don't know I'm just so worried about the kids.