Drug Rehab Options Blog

Well - it's not the first time and it IS with the same woman, who is also an alcoholic. He'd sworn up and down that he wasn't interested in her at all and he'd been drunk, etc. It's sure easy to blame alcohol for everything that goes wrong - isn't it?

Anyway - we'd split for a time when he met her and that would have been legit, except he hung onto me (his enabler) the whole time, and I couldn't really get rid of him completely because we owned a house together (I know not an excuse - but I needed him to be on board to at least try to help me sell, and he spent a lot of time trying to talk me out of it - which meant that I didn't get his support).

Found out that when I was getting together with a friend on Friday night - he decided to go out to the country to visit friends overnight. Well - he never left the city and spent all night until 4 the next afternoon with her. He's such a good liar that his lies were down to the last minute detail, but he'd left the computer on his mail passed out and I saw a message from her, which read that she was confused because he's told her that he loves her and was supposed to call her on Sunday, which he didn't and she knows NOTHING about me (he's such a good liar). He's been stringing her down the garden path as well ... but always blames his actions on the alcohol.

I freaked on him. It was the last straw. I woke him up out of a sound drunken sleep to confront him and he was still lying, even though I had the evidence, calling me insane, etc. I didn't sleep all night and today told him that was it! I wanted him out or I was leaving - although neither of us have anywhere to go, so it was moot. I was adamant though and held my ground. I told him never to touch me again, etc.

THEN - HE WENT TO REGISTER FOR REHAB TODAY - for the very first time. He's NEVER sought ANY help in all of the 13 years we've been together, although I've given him the information many times. He has an appointment for an assessment in a couple of weeks and is on call if there is a cancelation sooner. He said they told him I could join him for the consultation. Honestly, I told him that I wasn't sure I even cared enough to help with that and at the time I said it, I really meant it (but I feel myself softening a little).

Obviously, it took THIS nasty incident to happen in order for me to react firmly, and his worry of finally losing me for him to take the step. It's a HUGE step in the right direction (especially for the man who said he NEVER needed help with anything), but I'm feeling - too little - too late.

There is ZERO, ZILCH, NADA trust here. I wanted so badly to ditch him, and yet here I am just going with the flow ... I wish I had the courage of my convictions! Why should I have to put up with the abuse a second longer? He pleaded with me to give him 6 months.

Hi
just looking for your views on my habit

I can go all week without a drink.. even when im off work ( exept chrismas).. but as soon as it gets to friday night I cant resist..

I can promis my self all week that im not gonna drink at the weekend.. and still buckel every week.. this wouldnt bother me too much if i drank drink moderatly but i start on friday.. drink untill i fall asleep, wake up and usualy start drinking again... and this normaly happens untill i go to bet on sunday night..

do i fall into a catagory of alcoholic that i should be looking into or is it just pretty much black and white...

thanks

Well, I finally found out when I'm gonna be placed on Suboxone. Next Tuesday at 7:30 in the morning. They don't want me to take any opiods/opiates for two days straight which isn't a problem for me because I run out of Vicodin on Friday night. So really I have Saturday, Sunday, and Monday to get through with the damn withdrawals.

I have Gabapintin/Neurotin which I was told on here that the drug helps with the withdrawals and the Clonodine patch. Yet, I'm still unsure and I guess I need to grow a pair of balls and tough it out. At least I don't have to worry anymore WHEN I'll be put on the drug.

It's just strange that the clinic I'm going to seems absolutely clueless on a number of things that you guys already know about and have informed me by reading your posts and topics. It seems like I had to push for a great deal of things since my wacko doctor decided to take me off of Vicodin that the clinic should have done in the first place. Like, for example, me finding out who my clinician was. If I didn't ask around that day I believe she still wouldn't have gotten in touch with me and I'd be still waiting.

I have a group to go to on Friday and on Monday. I don't know if I can make the Monday group because I'll feel like crap...but she says its important because they need to take my vitals. I'm also guessing that they'll give me a drug test to see if I'm really off Vicodin or taking something else that I haven't told them about.

This is gonna be one hell of a weekend. ;)

I was just wondering if anyone here has seen other men whilst still in a relationship with an ABF/H???

I ask because i have been with my bf for 8yrs, 4yrs have involved serious depression, self harm and alcoholism, which came to a head in January this year and i left to live with my mum.

He is now in stable employment for 4wks now and has kept his drinking to a minimum.
But i still am not sure how i feel about our whole relationship, its not how it should be, full of love, closeness and passion. Its been like this for years now.
I can count on one hand how many times we have slept together and it doesnt bother me.
I do love him and he is a good looking guy but theres something stopping me from doing all the normal stuff couples do.
He on the other hand wants the intamcy back but understands i dont want to be pressured into anything.

Now the point im getting at, on friday night i was outrageously flirty with a guy on a works night out, we work together in my local hospital. im a nurse hes a doctor, single and extremely good looking.
Ive always had a bit of a soft spot for him but i didnt think id go this far.
We kissed and i went back to his flat for a bit more, not sex though.
I cant see it going any futher but i wont be seeing him until tomorrow and its gonna be so awkward.

Am i out of order or do you think i did this for a reason?
Im so confused and i feel terrible but i actually enjoyed being kissed and held by another guy.

I welcome any advice and i dont mind you being truthful
I think its because maybe i wanted to try being with someone new, to see how it made me feel and it felt good.

sam.x

Hi, I haven't posted in a couple of days...I've been attending a lot of meetings and been busy with Holiday stuff, etc...Now, again, it is Friday night, my husband is working and I am home with my daughters...I most likely would be drinking by now and have such a taste for wine, I can't tell you! I got through a couple of dinners this week no problem, but here at home alone...with the girls...is excruciating!! I guess I just needed to get that out. Reading other's stories is helping a little, but I am so anxious right now!!:Xmasbah

I need elp understanding why the A (recoverery 4 years) in my life still has to blame everything on me. And still treats me and the kids like crap. I would love to leave him but financially I can't. (Even though hes out of work now too.)

Today is a prime example. We decided yesterday to go today for the christmas tree with the kids (4 kids - 16, 14, 12, & 8). When he got up this morning or should I say this afternoon he acted like we weren't going. And even said so. Then when I told the kids we weren't going today he decided to take his shower and asked why we all were't ready yet. When we got out to the car he started yelling at me because I didn't fill the tire on the car. (He started to on friday night but claims he didn't. That it is now my job. Not his because he doesn't drive.)

We finally got to the tree farm and with him asking me what was wrong. Like he didn't know? I chose to ignore him. At the tree farm I of course picked the wrong way to go - cause he knows best. Then I picked the wrong tree of course. After cutting down the dreaded tree and paying for it I asked if we going in the barn for hot chocolate (we do this every year the kids expect it). He informs us he has to get back home to go work at the neighbors house. Like we were supposed to know he had to work.

Now the tree is still on the roof of the car, he's next door working and the kids have so much tension built up they are taking it out on each other.

Sorry this is so long. And probably makes no sense. Thanks for reading and thanks for being there I feel a little better typing this out.

Last episode: AH broke boundary and nearly lost his life.

Scene: formerly nice home, now run-down from neglect, weeds rampant, at least one broken down car in the driveway, and the "doggie-door" is a hole in the screen of the sliding door.

Wife: "Hello" (Says hesitantly as she answers because she knows the number)
AH: "Hi."
Wife: (Sigh) "Hi."
AH: "How are you?"
Wife: "Fine. How are you?"
AH: "What are you doing?"
Wife" "Eating popcorn, it is Friday night."
AH: "It's Friday night?"
Wife:"Yes."
AH: "I forgot."

Silence

AH: "I went to five meetings today."
Wife: "Good."
AH: "Miss me?"
Wife: (Thinking....) "The house is quiet. I miss having you around when you're clean."
AH: "I miss you too. Will you come visit me tomorrow?"
Wife: I can't.
AH:"Why?"
Wife: "My work Christmas party. I'm on the committee to set it up."
AH: "That's tomorrow?"
Wife: "Yes. I told you about this already."
AH: "I forgot."

Wife: "Will you bring me my white shirt with long sleeves so I can go to church with my mom?"
Wife" "I can't tomorrow. Let me think about it. It is a two-hour drive."
AH: "You don't really miss me, do you. You"re glad I'm gone."
Wife: "I told you already."
AH: "But you don't, do you???"
Wife: (coldly) "I'm not going to argue about this. Do you want to hang up?"
AH: "Yes."

Click.

:skillet

That's me under the skillet. Why do I answer the phone???

come one come all lets party the right way .. its been too long ..
hows everyone doing .. happy friday
YouTube - Peaceful Easy Feeling Eagles

So, I've posted on other threads that I've had problems saying no to this guy who seems to have this weird spell over me. Last night I went to a party with him. It was a good party, not too many people and I knew most of them so it wasn't too uncomfortable for me. Well, I ended up having a couple of drinks and that means today I'm back on day 1, but I don't feel half as crappy as I did on the last day 1. I'm a bit disappointed in myself, but also a a bit more determined to stay sober.

The victory was nice though. He wanted to buy some coke, and clearly expected me to pay for it. I didn't have my credit card anyway, so no hope of getting any cash for it. He told me to go home and get it. I told him if I left I wasn't coming back. He backed off for a while then on the drive home he started again, asking me to buy the drugs and he even called his source and started setting it up, but I made my "no" stick, I told him I wouldn't buy them and if he wanted to get drugs I would drop him at his place and he could figure it out himself. Well, that wouldn't work because his fiancee was at his apartment waiting for him and was under the impression he was at a meeting for a professional society we are in (as opposed to going to a party with me while she drove 120 miles to see him and babysat 3 little kids... honestly if the woman had any clue what was really going on, I like to think she'd dump his sorry butt.... but then I actually do know what's going on and seem unable or unwilling to keep him out of my life). I ignored his begging and took him home. I'm so proud of myself for saying no to him and for not doing drugs, as well. Because there's a little part of my brain that wanted the drugs.

I live in a major county without a non 12-step recovery (OC) but I live in South County. And on Friday nights, they have meetings in Vista. It is 50 miles away but there is Rock 105.3. And that drive is an easy drive.

I just decided to block out my social calendar for every Friday night for the next 6-12 months unless it is an out-of-town trip or BM (Burning Man) regional. I am losing the desire to drink socially even though my social life in high drinking scenes but I suck when I am alone. I do most of heavy drinking alone compared to social drinking. On social drinking, I am do not drink excessively but rather I drink alone.

Getting me involved that program is a good thing and plus I got no problem with AA so I can get to the AA meetings on the weekends.