Archive for the ‘Hypocrite’ tag
lost girl…
My husband has a drinking problem. It's like this horrible cycle. He stays out until 11 or 12 and gets drunk; he stays home the next night, but doesn't move from the couch. This makes me angry, and I am not nice to him when he is home, so the next night he goes and gets drunk. And it repeats over and over and over. We used to party together. We used to talk. We used to have so much in common. Now we have a 3 year old, and I don't feel like I can have one drink at all without being a hypocrite. I don't have a problem with drinking. But I don't even want to drink because of what it is doing to my husband, my marriage, my self-confidence, my daughter, our future. I have told him that I feel neglected. He went and got drunk. I told him that we needed to talk; he went camping and got drunk, went to a football game and got drunk, etc. Am i making him drink? Am I making him choose alcohol over me and our daughter? I feel like this is my fault. All of it. I have tried to lay down some rules, but all that does it make him retaliatory. And then I get hurt more. He took my cell phone, password protected the computer at home, he leaves with our only car seat. I used to be so strong and confident. My friends don't even call anymore because I can never keep our plans as I don't know if he is coming home or not, or how drunk he will be when he gets there. I feel so cheated, and well, just plain lost. How did I get here? It's like I woke up one morning, and I am "that" girl. How did this happen? I'm that girl that people feel sorry for, and I don't know how that happened. I am not financially able to leave, and being a child of divorce, I do not want that for my daughter. I just don't know how to get through to him. I don't know what I am supposed to do, and I certainly do not know how to fix this.
I feel so lost…
I am probably posting in the wrong place, I am very sorry.
My husband has a drinking problem. It's like this horrible cycle. He stays out until 11 or 12 and gets drunk; he stays home the next night, but doesn't move from the couch. This makes me angry, and I am not nice to him when he is home, so the next night he goes and gets drunk. And it repeats over and over and over. We used to party together. We used to talk. We used to have so much in common. Now we have a 3 year old, and I don't feel like I can have one drink at all without being a hypocrite. I don't have a problem with drinking. But I don't even want to drink because of what it is doing to my husband, my marriage, my self-confidence, my daughter, our future. I have told him that I feel neglected. He went and got drunk. I told him that we needed to talk; he went camping and got drunk, went to a football game and got drunk, etc. Am i making him drink? Am I making him choose alcohol over me and our daughter? I feel like this is my fault. All of it. Is our life so awful that he feels like he HAS to drink? I have tried to lay down some rules, but all that does it make him retaliatory. And then I get hurt more. He gets so mean. He took my cell phone, password protected the computer at home, he leaves with our only car seat. I used to be so strong and confident. My friends don't even call anymore because I can never keep our plans as I don't know if he is coming home or not, or how drunk he will be when he gets there. I feel so cheated, and well, just plain lost. How did I get here? It's like I woke up one morning, and I am "that" girl. How did this happen? I'm that girl that people feel sorry for, and I don't know how that happened. I am not financially able to leave, and being a child of divorce, I do not want that for my daughter. I just don't know how to get through to him. I don't know what I am supposed to do, and I certainly do not know how to fix this. I just don't know what to do... I know that I am not alone in the way that I feel, but I am alone in this marriage. I just want to be able to fix this so badly.
My husband has a drinking problem. It's like this horrible cycle. He stays out until 11 or 12 and gets drunk; he stays home the next night, but doesn't move from the couch. This makes me angry, and I am not nice to him when he is home, so the next night he goes and gets drunk. And it repeats over and over and over. We used to party together. We used to talk. We used to have so much in common. Now we have a 3 year old, and I don't feel like I can have one drink at all without being a hypocrite. I don't have a problem with drinking. But I don't even want to drink because of what it is doing to my husband, my marriage, my self-confidence, my daughter, our future. I have told him that I feel neglected. He went and got drunk. I told him that we needed to talk; he went camping and got drunk, went to a football game and got drunk, etc. Am i making him drink? Am I making him choose alcohol over me and our daughter? I feel like this is my fault. All of it. Is our life so awful that he feels like he HAS to drink? I have tried to lay down some rules, but all that does it make him retaliatory. And then I get hurt more. He gets so mean. He took my cell phone, password protected the computer at home, he leaves with our only car seat. I used to be so strong and confident. My friends don't even call anymore because I can never keep our plans as I don't know if he is coming home or not, or how drunk he will be when he gets there. I feel so cheated, and well, just plain lost. How did I get here? It's like I woke up one morning, and I am "that" girl. How did this happen? I'm that girl that people feel sorry for, and I don't know how that happened. I am not financially able to leave, and being a child of divorce, I do not want that for my daughter. I just don't know how to get through to him. I don't know what I am supposed to do, and I certainly do not know how to fix this. I just don't know what to do... I know that I am not alone in the way that I feel, but I am alone in this marriage. I just want to be able to fix this so badly.
Is Ambien safe to use?
Today is my 6th day of getting clean and it has been going really well. My only real issue right now is the insomnia. During the day I feel pretty okay, I can deal with it you know, but when I try to go to bed forget it!! I got 3 hours of sleep between Tuesday and Wednesday and I spent all of last night laying awake staring at the green light on my cable box. My legs and hands started to hurt so I took a bunch of Ibuprofen and a shower but still no sleep at all!!!
My husbands friend said he could give me a few Ambien, they help him fall asleep fast, but it is safe for me to take this or am I being a hypocrite to myself?
This is the longest I have gone without drugs and I don't want to anything that will screw it up. How long does the insomnia usually last? I really hope not much longer than this!!! :wtf2
My husbands friend said he could give me a few Ambien, they help him fall asleep fast, but it is safe for me to take this or am I being a hypocrite to myself?
This is the longest I have gone without drugs and I don't want to anything that will screw it up. How long does the insomnia usually last? I really hope not much longer than this!!! :wtf2
Enemy Tactics
Monday, November 3, 2008
Enemy Tactics
I do so with Christ's authority for your benefit, so that Satan will not outsmart us. For we are very familiar with his evil schemes.
— 2 Corinthians 2:10–11
The devil tends to use the same tactics over and over again. I suppose he operates by the old adage, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it."
He has used these techniques, plans, and strategies since the Garden of Eden, and they have worked with great effect to bring down countless people. Therefore, he just keeps bringing them back, generation after generation.
That is the bad news. The good news is that we know what they are, because they are clearly identified in the Bible.
The devil is a dangerous wolf that sometimes disguises himself as a sheep. Sometimes he roars like a lion. But more often he comes like a snake. Sometimes he comes to us in all of his depravity and horror. Other times he comes to us as an angel of light. This is why we always need to be on guard.
He will tempt you and whisper, "Trust me on this. Go ahead and sin. You will get away with it. No one will ever know." So you take the bait and fall into sin.
Then the devil shouts, "What a hypocrite! Do you think God would ever hear your prayers? And don't even bother going to church!" Sadly, some people will listen to this, believe it, and be driven away.
Just remember, no matter what you have done, no matter what sin you have committed, God will always be ready to forgive you if you will turn from that sin and return to Him. Don't let the devil isolate you from God's Word and God's people, because that is exactly what he is trying to do.
Greg Laurie
Copyright ©2008 by Harvest Ministries. All Rights Reserved.
Enemy Tactics
I do so with Christ's authority for your benefit, so that Satan will not outsmart us. For we are very familiar with his evil schemes.
— 2 Corinthians 2:10–11
The devil tends to use the same tactics over and over again. I suppose he operates by the old adage, "If it ain't broke, don't fix it."
He has used these techniques, plans, and strategies since the Garden of Eden, and they have worked with great effect to bring down countless people. Therefore, he just keeps bringing them back, generation after generation.
That is the bad news. The good news is that we know what they are, because they are clearly identified in the Bible.
The devil is a dangerous wolf that sometimes disguises himself as a sheep. Sometimes he roars like a lion. But more often he comes like a snake. Sometimes he comes to us in all of his depravity and horror. Other times he comes to us as an angel of light. This is why we always need to be on guard.
He will tempt you and whisper, "Trust me on this. Go ahead and sin. You will get away with it. No one will ever know." So you take the bait and fall into sin.
Then the devil shouts, "What a hypocrite! Do you think God would ever hear your prayers? And don't even bother going to church!" Sadly, some people will listen to this, believe it, and be driven away.
Just remember, no matter what you have done, no matter what sin you have committed, God will always be ready to forgive you if you will turn from that sin and return to Him. Don't let the devil isolate you from God's Word and God's people, because that is exactly what he is trying to do.
Greg Laurie
Copyright ©2008 by Harvest Ministries. All Rights Reserved.
Judge Knot
I judge myself. So, donÂ’t you dare!
Prejudge your own reproachful stare.
Think thrice. Then, thank theocracy,
Thick tongues throw forth hypocrisy.
Red noses don’t make one a clown –
IÂ’m not amused. You want renown.
Like hellÂ’s bells, your laughterÂ’s hollow.
Life and soul? Hard act to follow.
Arise and smell the stench of death,
Embalming fluid on your breath.
Its cunning ploy: you play the sucker.
Baffled now; you beg for succour.
You called yourself a human-ist.
Like fearful humans, you ran – pissed.
Will you find hope? Can you relate
To thine own massesÂ’ opiate?
WhoÂ’s a hypocrite? Dag nab it!
Casting stones is my old habit.
Applaud myself, fore IÂ’m humble.
Judging you – myself, I rumble.
Forgive all others. Let them be.
IÂ’m judginÂ’ you. YouÂ’re judginÂ’ me.
Still, my and thy will to-and-fro.
May be our nature. What do we know?
Yet, Mother Earth be ware not true;
So, you judge me. Then, I judge you.
Our Father Sun, on higher plain,
Said: “Judge not . . .” We hope: not in vain.
~~ dox
Prejudge your own reproachful stare.
Think thrice. Then, thank theocracy,
Thick tongues throw forth hypocrisy.
Red noses don’t make one a clown –
IÂ’m not amused. You want renown.
Like hellÂ’s bells, your laughterÂ’s hollow.
Life and soul? Hard act to follow.
Arise and smell the stench of death,
Embalming fluid on your breath.
Its cunning ploy: you play the sucker.
Baffled now; you beg for succour.
You called yourself a human-ist.
Like fearful humans, you ran – pissed.
Will you find hope? Can you relate
To thine own massesÂ’ opiate?
WhoÂ’s a hypocrite? Dag nab it!
Casting stones is my old habit.
Applaud myself, fore IÂ’m humble.
Judging you – myself, I rumble.
Forgive all others. Let them be.
IÂ’m judginÂ’ you. YouÂ’re judginÂ’ me.
Still, my and thy will to-and-fro.
May be our nature. What do we know?
Yet, Mother Earth be ware not true;
So, you judge me. Then, I judge you.
Our Father Sun, on higher plain,
Said: “Judge not . . .” We hope: not in vain.
~~ dox
Letting Go
Hi everyone. I have a few random thoughts/questions that I need help with. I left the AH 4 weeks ago, since then he has relapsed (was sober for almost 4 years) back into heavy drinking and I've found out that he has been having an affair. Yep all the time that I was there supporting him (emotionally and financially) so he could work on his recovery he was cheating. He even had the ___ to introduce to her to MY friends in the apartment building. This must have been deliberate as he knew it would get back to me. I ran myself stupid so that I could make enough money, lost weight and started having heart palpations all due to stress, he stopped being intimate with me last year, and now I guess I know why.
The hurt and anger I felt (and still do) was overwhelming and consuming. I'm working on letting it all go and giving it up to my HP but and there's always that but, it's so hard.
I know I'm mourning the loss/death of what I thought our marriage was - reality vs the fantasy. I know it's a process that I MUST go thru, I know I'm better off, I know there are so many positive things going on in my life, I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW.
BUT WHY is it so frigging hard to let go of all of this? There is no reason for me to want this man, he's a looser and a user, a cheat, a liar, a manipulator, a hypocrite, a drunk, totally irresponsible, has no money no job and no intentions of getting one, he's a parasite living off anyone he can con.
AND YET I STILL THINK ABOUT HIM??
What is wrong with me? Please don't think I think about him all the time, I don't but every now and then I catch myself and then the pit in the stomach thing happens, the anger starts bubbling up and sometimes I even get short of breath. I busy myself, walking with Kingston, reading/posting here, talking with my friends anything.
Each day it gets better but it's so hard. Have you been thru this or something similiar. I guess I just don't understand how a AH could treat their wife this way.
Thanks for listening - K
The hurt and anger I felt (and still do) was overwhelming and consuming. I'm working on letting it all go and giving it up to my HP but and there's always that but, it's so hard.
I know I'm mourning the loss/death of what I thought our marriage was - reality vs the fantasy. I know it's a process that I MUST go thru, I know I'm better off, I know there are so many positive things going on in my life, I KNOW I KNOW I KNOW.
BUT WHY is it so frigging hard to let go of all of this? There is no reason for me to want this man, he's a looser and a user, a cheat, a liar, a manipulator, a hypocrite, a drunk, totally irresponsible, has no money no job and no intentions of getting one, he's a parasite living off anyone he can con.
AND YET I STILL THINK ABOUT HIM??
What is wrong with me? Please don't think I think about him all the time, I don't but every now and then I catch myself and then the pit in the stomach thing happens, the anger starts bubbling up and sometimes I even get short of breath. I busy myself, walking with Kingston, reading/posting here, talking with my friends anything.
Each day it gets better but it's so hard. Have you been thru this or something similiar. I guess I just don't understand how a AH could treat their wife this way.
Thanks for listening - K
Curiosity is getting to me again.
I feel like the biggest hypocrite right now. All those positive posts I have posted. I still feel that way. But I am not going to pretend like everything is working like clock work either.
But tonight I am feeling urges. Not to get high. Not even for the drug. The freakin atmosphere of chaos.
OMG..Thats what drives me crazy when I am over there high. I am thinking what people are doing.
I put minutes on my phone today for the first time in 2 months. It should be safe by now. But I was going through my text messages and found a number. I deleted every single number in my phone 2 months ago. I didnt think to look in the texts. Now I am wanting to call this person and see whats going on. Just in general.
I have gotten rid of the number. And I dont know this one by heart. I only know 2 and I have no reason to call those numbers.
I dont know. I guess I am bored tonight. While everyone else is out at the club and having friends over like my cousins are doing. I am sitting home all by myself.
Nothing on tv. bored with the computer. My whole mood just flipped fast.
I'd play nintendo but that thing pi$$es me off.
Found out my brother..not real brother but he might as well be is in prison again. His mug looks really bad. He lives in NC and I only know where he is when he does get locked up. He is a crack addict too.
Just one of those days I guess. It will be better tomorrow.
Just feeling down and needed to vent.
I really hate how I feel like I am missing out on something over there. I am not missing anything except a bunch of crazy BS.
:wtf2
But tonight I am feeling urges. Not to get high. Not even for the drug. The freakin atmosphere of chaos.
OMG..Thats what drives me crazy when I am over there high. I am thinking what people are doing.
I put minutes on my phone today for the first time in 2 months. It should be safe by now. But I was going through my text messages and found a number. I deleted every single number in my phone 2 months ago. I didnt think to look in the texts. Now I am wanting to call this person and see whats going on. Just in general.
I have gotten rid of the number. And I dont know this one by heart. I only know 2 and I have no reason to call those numbers.
I dont know. I guess I am bored tonight. While everyone else is out at the club and having friends over like my cousins are doing. I am sitting home all by myself.
Nothing on tv. bored with the computer. My whole mood just flipped fast.
I'd play nintendo but that thing pi$$es me off.
Found out my brother..not real brother but he might as well be is in prison again. His mug looks really bad. He lives in NC and I only know where he is when he does get locked up. He is a crack addict too.
Just one of those days I guess. It will be better tomorrow.
Just feeling down and needed to vent.
I really hate how I feel like I am missing out on something over there. I am not missing anything except a bunch of crazy BS.
:wtf2
