Drug Rehab Options Blog

I just want to let you all know, that I'm still hanging in there...made it to day 8. My hubby is the one who said I should put "still doing great" in the title...lol.
He also says that he's proud of me, I'm proud of me too.
I'm telling myself, that I'm not quitting, I'm just cutting back and taking it a day at a time. Will I have some beer tomorrow? I don't know...Will I never have beer again? I don't know that answer to that either. All I know is that I'm not doing it right now and that tomorrow morning I will wake up the same way I did this morning...feeling pretty darn good!
I can't believe that I made it this long....would have had at least 3-4 drunk nights in by now...Gesh, that's about $40.
I love doing crafts and the past couple of days I have stopped by the craft store to buy some things for a new project that I just discovered...I ended spending some money on crafts instead of beer, now I have something to show for with no guilt.
Just wanted to share and say "I love you" guys!!!
:You_Rock_

XOXO

P.S. And yes, coming to this wonderful place has played the majority role in why I haven't drank for 8 DAYS!!!!
THANKS AGAIN!!!

I was at peace with seperating from Ah (I posted a while ago about me making plans to leave). Before I could do things how I wanted, Ah had a really bad night and I had to leave abruptly with the kids (I stayed at my mom's until yesterday). This was about 2 weeks ago.

After much pleading from AH that he needs his family and the promise that he had started his recovery (going to counceling)and has been sober, last night I came back home.
I could tell instantly that he was not sober. So I imedately started looking for places to live (once again).
He realized he messed up and called his mother and she picked him up and took him to her house for the night.

I continued to make plans to leave (since he said he needed the house). This morning he comes home and is regretful and wanting to start more intensive treatment. I couldn't get him to go to inpatient, but he agreed to out patient at the addiction center where he has counseling. He left this afternoon and said he will stay away until we have our maritial counseling appt. on Wed.
We came to this agreement after much MUCH discussion and me almost loosing my mind! The man wants us to live together still while he recovers.... I just don't know if I can do it! He said he needs his family for stability and that having stability is a big part of his recovery..... I kept trying to explain that we should not be together right now.....<pulling hair out>

I was glad that he came around and will stay at his folks until our appt. where hopefully we can work something out.

I hate that it puts me in Limbo! will he find somewhere to stay so that the kids and I can stay here...or do I need to keep looking for a place...ahhhh

What I did realize through our discussion today is that i can NO LONGER procrastinate about getting a SPONSOR! I must do this at my next meeting. I was going to ask someone at my last meeting, but then I wasn't sure who to ask. One week I think I know and the next week it changes...ahhh....I don't care any more...lol if they have a pulse and they are at the meeting they will be asked to be my sponsor....lol

I don't know. I'll see if I can make this short and understandable. lol.
I've been seeing this guy off and on and I don't know what to think.
They say if it's to good to be true.... Well.... He's rich, amazingly cute,
a doctor, and nice. At first everything we did was easy and fun.
I'm sure you know where this is going, it wasn't long, before I started
seeing his 'other side'. But after each time something happened he
had some reason, usually work, etc. I didn't get it because it came out
of the blue, and then he would be fine again. And sorry..

So fast forward to yesterday. We get into a wreck, the guy who hits us gets out, and he goes crazy. I try and get him to stop and he shoves me again, it turns into a huge ordeal, and finally the cops come.

So we end up at the ER. I had a concussion and a cut my head, nothing major.
Yesterday was a little strange, I don't know how to explain it.
Just a weird experience. Then when we leave they give me some Vicodin,
I tell them no it's okay, and he says, No, you need it, and he takes it.

After we got to his house, he was being his normal self, I felt fine besides my headache, then we decide to watch a movie, and he gives me a Vicodin and it wasn't long before I start feeling sick. So I decide to leave and he freaks
By the time I get home, I was a complete mess.

I haven't told any of my friends about what is going on or him, I'm not even sure why, or I guess because things got weird so fast, and I guess I called one of my friends and was crying, I don't remember that. I just remember throwing up all night and a few random things.
So I don't think it was a Vicodin he gave me.

I met him for lunch today and the first thing I ask him is, sooo.
What the hell did you give me last night, and he starts to :c004:

I just looked at him and said, Really..... Your going to yell at me........
Are you going to shove me again too, or hit me.....

He apologizes like he always does.. He just can't believe I would accuse
him of such a thing, after I tell him what happened, he goes into this
long reason, why...... He's a doctor, he always has good reasons.

Then he tells me......... That he booked us tickets to go to Hawaii in February.......


I don't even know what to think right now. I don't know if I am just over reacting. When things are good, they are great and he is Amazing.
The few times there have been those incidents, at first I think like I would tell anyone else, OMG, No that's not okay... But then I start thinking,
No he didn't really "Hit You" there were no closed fists, or I lost my balance.
I bruise easy, etc...
And I know I do make people mad.... :MissDone
Usually when we talk, it's so easy, and we can talk for hours about anything.
But when he gets weird, he can take something I've said and use it against me. It's so weird... I liked him so much at first because he didn't judge me, and like I could just be me. I don't feel like that hardly ever anymore.


I started to figure out yesterday that maybe he's addicted to Vicoden.
He always has a bottle of pills with him, but he says it's tylenol 3 for his hand, I don't know, stupid stuff.... His mood thing would kind of make sense.


I guess I probably sound stupid, even hearing myself, but it happened so fast, I feel like this has been a year and it's barely been a couple of weeks.


I don't know what to do, I can't talk to any of my friends, because they would freak out, as would my parents... I guess I just need another opinion, because I don't get how something can be so perfect and so bad at the same time....... Well besides crystal meth.......
Funny I was this confused when I was on meth also, lol.
Talking about this makes me so sick to my stomach. I don't know why.
I don't know what is wrong with me....... I just feel so lost.
But maybe I am overreacting...

I guess there's another part of me that keeps thinking if this keeps up, at least I'll keep losing weight, so I don't know if maybe that's part of what
has me all confused also.

Ha Ha, so much for being short. My Mind is spinning so fast, I don't think short is in my vocabulary.......

posted also in the Narcotics 12 step forumLast night I was at a meeting and my hubby called. It was my dad....he slipped away into eternity while watching the Viking game with my mom.... tomorrow I will fly back to San Diego to help my mom.

Please pray I make wise choices and and super vigilant about my recovery!!!!! I really thought I was going to skate into my year of clean time 1/20/09 easily. This will not be easy. I want to come home and give you guys all a good report. I do not even have my laptop, as it is in the shop.....

My Dad Howard was not ill, I had an awesome 2 weeks w/ he and my Mom....I still cannot believe he is gone....he was just 75 and may have had a stroke or thrown a clot into his lung. He was not in pain, only winded my mom said.....then he closed his eyes and was gone.

I loved him so much. He helped form my silly personality, always a jokester he was.....he was kind and a God fearing man. He did an awesome job as a Dad and a husband. He worked at Rohr Industries for 45 years as a tool and die worker. He and my mom were married for 52 yrs. He loved Jesus and the verse I have in my avator is the verse he read as a boy and received Christ as he Savior.

Thanks guys. Sheila

I love you and miss you Daddy and will see you in a little while....love Sam

(he always called me Sam cuz he wanted to name me Samatha and my mom named me Sheila) lol

Howard E. G. 8/29/33-1/4/09

Last night I was at a meeting and my hubby called. It was my dad....he slipped away into eternity while watching the Viking game with my mom.... tomorrow I will fly back to San Diego to help my mom.

Please pray I make wise choices and and super vigilant about my recovery!!!!! I really thought I was going to skate into my year of clean time 1/20/09 easily. This will not be easy. I want to come home and give you guys all a good report. I do not even have my laptop, as it is in the shop.....

My Dad Howard was not ill, I had an awesome 2 weeks w/ he and my Mom....I still cannot believe he is gone....he was just 75 and may have had a stroke or thrown a clot into his lung. He was not in pain, only winded my mom said.....then he closed his eyes and was gone.

I loved him so much. He helped form my silly personality, always a jokester he was.....he was kind and a God fearing man. He did an awesome job as a Dad and a husband. He worked at Rohr Industries for 45 years as a tool and die worker. He and my mom were married for 52 yrs.

Thanks guys. Sheila

I love you and miss you Daddy and will see you in a little while....love Sam

(he always called me Sam cuz he wanted to name me Samatha and my mom named me Sheila) lol

Howard E. G. 8/29/33-1/4/09

I know a lot of people mean well, "call if you need to, don't pick up, if you need to vent, I'm here.............." and I managed to maneuver and keep away from all of the drinking situations and as well the people who seem to just want to be up in my inventory.

Why do people feel the need to go out of their way to just be miserable towards me? It's the holidays, give me a present and just be nice. If you want me to fail at this don't be so obvious about it. If you don't trust me with my kids which has never been an issue, go get a court order against me but leave me alone!!!!!!

And then there's the one person who just seems to want to "pop" in, never does but I believe it's because they want to find me on my couch inebriated, down and out so they can have something to talk about.

If anything, for New Years, my resolution will be to keep standing up for myself, keep going, persevering, keep my eye on the prize and know that this time next year it's going to be much better.

Heh, you know what one of my friends told me about the men I pick? We both laughed because it's true but just funny, "men are like noses, they're all good but I keep picking boogers." LOL!!!! Oh what a knee slapper!!!!


Is it over yet? :Xmasbah

I dont know about the rest of you. But I need to remind myself ALOT of what is good in my life.
I get too caught up in what is wrong...I forget how blessed I really am and how much worse it can always get.
So maybe some of you will join me in coming here everyday or even every other day. And tell us at least one thing that is good.
Everyone has something.
Hope its ok to start this here. If it doesnt take off..Then Anna can just move or delete. You can anyway..Cause your the mod..LOL..

Ok..Today..I feel alot better. I had the worst past 3 days I have experienced in awhile. I got extra hours at work, took a nice nap when I got home. And just drank some good warm broth.


Ok..Who's next?

Well first off Happy Holidays (not usually politically correct lol)
Kids opened their gifts and hoping they are going back to bed soon (doubtful though) SO cam on here.
To all of you that have inspired and helped me thus far I thank you with all my heart.I feel I do have a couple friends now. Albeit online friends but better than none.
Wish I can send you all gift cards!! I would not have been able to do it this far without your guys and gals..!!
So again THANKS!! As I can go on forever about this I wont. As the kids need me to build the stuff. Ughh some assembly required (dont you hate that word lol)
You are soap to my sponge!!

You Guys Rock

:MusBand:

hopefully there are some other baseball fans on this site besides myself. im sure most of them arent yankee fans tho so im sure to recieve some heat for writing this lol.


first we get CC and AJ Burnett to put our pitching rotation as CC , AJ , Wang, Joba, and either Hughes or Pettite.

then just days later out of nowhere we sign Texiera for 8 years hohohohoho. i couldn't believe it myself when i first saw it(would have rather signed manny for a few years instead of texiera for all those years but oh well)

When i started thinking about the lineup we will be putting out there next year couldnt help but think World Series 09 ring comin our way! GO YANKS!


Discuss..........

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lol