Drug Rehab Options Blog

I've read a lot of posts here from a lot of people covering different situations and I am a little sadden that I am not seeing more positive stories from people. I know that there are a lot out there to be read. Maybe I'm lucky that my situation I was in worked out. I know there are people new here that are looking for advice and I know that some are in situations that they should get out of. I would like to give out some advice to some new members that there is hope if you alcoholic is willing to sober up. You do need to take care of yourself first but keep in mind your spouse has an illness. Remember all is not lost. I have been married for 22 years and 15 of it my spouse drank everyday. I was out of love and lost but after my spouse admitted the problem and sobered up I fell in love again with the person I married long ago. Have hope if you are in a situation that can be overcome.

Maybe I'm wrong to post this but I feel that some people need to hear there are some good positive stories out there

Just a quick note to let y'all know that I'm back from my trip. :c009:

Yesterday was an airport nightmare and today I am utterly exhausted, but I am HOME! And if anyone wants to see any of my Niagara Falls pictures, just let me know! I actually got a few good ones - I am very pleased. Froze every last little body part I had to get them.... but it was worth it!

So, in scrolling through posts it feels like I've been away a lot longer than 4 days!!!! I have some MAJOR catching up to do! But I wanted to say hi because I've missed you all so VERY much! I thought about this place A LOT while I was gone. But hey, I was stuck in 2 different airports yesterday for a total of about 10 1/2 hours and I did NOT set foot into a hotel bar! Not even a place to get food that even sold alcohol (and that was hard to do in Detroit - their airport is huge and has a lot of stuff). So... YAY ME! 97 days and still goin'. :ghug

Oh, and here's one picture for ya:

So I've been sneaking drinks since I was around 16 and I'm 23 now and still sneaking them. Back in the day I used to get drunk often but today am still functional the vast majority of the time. In a given day between the moment I wake and go to bed I can consume 14 drinks without much of an issue (though by the end of the night I'm feeling it a bit and in the morning I have to have a drink or two to steady myself).

I can go out for a night of drinks at the bar and control myself well enough that I only have a couple and be able to drive home without a hitch; I've even been pulled over by a cop after one of these nights and let go with a warning to drive slower.

I have no problem not having a drink at first, but when I have one at any point I find myself confronted with the fact that I can't keep myself from not having another, which leads to having another and another and another.

My friends are all drinkers who manage their drinking well. All of our nights together usually involve a drink or two. My family also drinks often and every family function involves drinks. I've been OK with that as well. It's when I get alone that I have problems.

I can go out for a night on the down and only have a few drinks, but upon getting home I find myself having a six pack and/or shots of whiskey. I don't know why I do it. I don't want to do it, but I can't go to bed unless I do.

I find that I drink faster than everyone else and I get uncomfortable because I would rather finish the next drink than hold a conversation.

I also don't drink cheap. I LOVE good beer and the effort that goes into making an intricate microbrew. I have even brewed hundreds of bottles worth of my own beer. This makes it all more expensive than it should be, I suppose, if I were sucking down Natural Light or Crystal Palace gin. The fact that I spend a lot of my time creating drinks makes things much more difficult for me, because I feel like I have a connection to alcohol that most alcoholics do not. Of course, I realize that this could also be me tricking myself.

This post has been a hell of a lot longer than I ever meant it to be. But there it is.

<3

Hi!
Someone (let's call her "L") who is active in AA with a lot of time, is telling others that I am using, along with my boyfriend/SO who used to be married to L. They have a child together and she is very angry at him for not reconciling.

I am not using, and I don't think my bf is, either. I have not noticed anything at all unusual about him, he's working a lot which is really good considering the economy. I really don't think he is using, but the problem about rumors is it casts a shadow of doubt.

I am active in NA, attend meetings and have a service position which I love doing. I have a sponsor and one sponsee. I used to attend 3 meetings a week, now it's less (1-2x) due to the holidays and bad weather plus to get to each meeting and back is a 50 mile drive for me. I have been involved in NA since 1999. I relapsed in 2005, coming back in 2006. So that's some background on me.

2 years ago I moved to a small community, where no one has ever seen me "out there." There is a big difference between how I look and act when I'm clean. I just don't think that people who knew me back then would think this.

My sponsor said, consider the source, and the best thing was to show up at meetings regularly and not waste a lot of breath denying this. To get to more meetings, will involve quite a commitment to driving on mountain passages in icy/foggy conditions, but maybe that's what I need to do, recommit myself to 3 x a week?

Has anyone ever been in this position? Any advice? I have enjoyed a good reputation and I feel this tarnishes it. Tomorrow is our ASC and I will show up at that, should I say something?

I am really disappointed in this side of the fellowship.

Thanks.

I heard that line in a movie last night and howdy did it get my attention. It summed up nicely all my thoughts over the last month or so.

From my RAD to my mother who is wrapped up in my probably mentally ill sister's latest drama. From my son who struggles with compassion and detachment, to my husband who I finally realized has a lot of fear related to love.

All I can give them, and will continue to give, is the gift of love. I've detached from all their issues and discovered I love them more than I thought. No exchange needed, it is mine to give up close and personal, or from afar.

I've been sober for a little over 10 years now and have had the same sponsor since I was in my first year of sobriety.

In the beginning he was great. Always available, patient, worked the steps with me. Helped me to laugh and enjoy life for the first time ever.

Skip ahead 10 years and our relationship has evolved.

For one thing, he's old enough to be my father (I came in rather young and he took me under his wing) and in a lot of ways when I meet with him I feel like it's an obligatory meeting with a parent. I feel almost annoyed by him sometimes. It's the same thing over and over (and I'm not even talking recovery stuff). About my car, his car, his diet, my diet, etc., etc.. I feel as though I'm suffering a fool most of the time.

Another thing is that he also talks to me about other people he sponsors and it makes me uncomfortable. Now let's say he sponsored a guy named Joe who was picking up prostitutes and cheating on his wife. He wouldn't say "Joe cheats on his wife with prostitutes." He might say "Joe has a lust problem. We've been talking a lot about his lust problem." Or something along those lines. This has been going on for awhile and it, of course, makes me measure what I tell him.

So in essence it's like he's not even sponsoring me anymore. Occasionally he will give me a nugget, but it's not too often.

Lately this relationship (with my sponsor) has come up in my therapy sessions. My therapist says I should cut way down on the amount of time I see him and/or let him go. My therapist also thinks that I should talk to him about why.

I'm just at a loss as to what to do. We've been really close for all of these years. I sometimes look around the rooms at the meetings I go to and think that there is no one there I'd even want to have as a sponsor.

Does anyone have any practical experience with a similar situation?

Thanks.

We're partners in a construction company in a major metropolitan city. Our offices are located downtown and there's an alley that runs behind them.

There's a homeless woman named Linda who, with her 40 year old son, have slept in makeshift tents in the alley for many years. She and her son are alcoholics and like most homeless, have suffered a lot of abuse. This city has recently done a major clean up regarding the homeless and tent cities, but there aren't enough facilities to house them.

You know those sheds you can buy for your backyard, use for storage? Some of the partners decided to buy a shed for Linda and her son, it's 18ft x 10ft. They've put it on our lot, behind one of our buildings, and I sent a couple of sleeping bags this morning.

They deliberately didn't tell me about it until this morning because they figured the first words out of my mouth would be "enabling." I admit I went round and round with it inside my head, then finally gave in. This woman has been on the streets for at least 20 years and we're all pretty certain she and her son have mental illness. At least they'll be warm and safe because our lot is locked. They have to be there when we leave for the day or be locked out. It's their choice.

Part of me is so proud of all of them for their generous spirit but the other part is wondering what can of worms have they opened? I guess we'll just deal with it as it comes along, one day at a time.

I think right now the bonus I have to look forward to with all my "bah-humbugness" is that for the last few days of the week I'll be off from work!! Which means I can lay around and do nothing. I don't have to get up at O'dark-hundred in the morning.

But just knowing that after tomorrow with it being Christmas Eve and then Christmas, I'm home free!!!!!!!

There is a lot of emotional, family, kids stuff I'm having to deal with, work through, however you want to put it, that I'm not thrilled with having to "deal" with but THAT is almost over too, so YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you for letting me vent and share.

YAHOO!!!!!!! Aiy-eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOO HOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's almost over, it's almost over, it's almost over..........Woo Woo!!!!!!

:Xmaskstar::Xmasdstar

A second night of not sleeping; I read the Ambien thread until after 2am...didn't do any good, guys, I'm still wide awake ;). I've ingested some carbs (because I forgot to eat dinner earlier) and three Advil as well. So, until I start feeling drowsy, I'd like to share a little story (in this Forum because I am still new to this recovery stuff).

Last week, I took my son to Subway to get dinner. Near the register, they had these delicious-looking cookies. My teenager pointed them out.

"Yes, they look tempting," I admitted. "But be careful because one is too many and a thousand never enough." I smiled at him. My son has no idea that I've been "hearing" this a lot (at NA meetings, on SR, in NA and AA literature). Anyway, my son looked at me as if I had two heads.

"That doesn't make any sense," he argued and then went on to explain how the statement makes absolutely no sense to him.

I hope with all my heart that he will never personally understand the statement. When I first heard it (only recently), it was in relation to substance abuse. Now that I reflect back, I see that I never argued the premise. I never had a need to -- because to me it made perfect sense.