Drug Rehab Options Blog

I have been sponsoring a guy for the first time, he is only a couple years younger than me, but is already very progressed alcoholic. He has struggled hard with crystal meth, narcotics, and chronic drinking. I mean, drinking Listerine when he runs out of booze, getting into blackouts every time... He recently relapsed and was on a a 3 day bender, culminating in him getting arrested last night for stealing booze at a booze store (which he doesn't remember), and being released today. To top it all off, he has very enabling parents who refuse to kick him out of the house, and a girlfriend who I see as a classic enabler (her dad was an alcoholic, her sister married an alcoholic...) and is supporting him by not leaving him despite his relapses (not to mention that she is trying to stay sober herself using the "marijuana maintenance" program).

He says he wants to do what he is told. IE, go to as many meetings as possible, read his books, do the steps, etc. ...but I think he is just going to relapse again. He has been in long term treatment, short term treatment, taken the religious route etc. but I suspect that as long as his parents and this girl are taking care of him, he will continue until he is in jail permanently.

I am considering just telling him that I can't sponsor him, and he needs to talk to an old timer who has the teeth to let him have it. I have my own problems and don't think I have the years of experience needed to sponsor someone like this. I am thinking that if he relapses again after this I will just tell him to get a new sponsor because I can't be close to someone who is not doing what they are supposed to. For my own sanity and spiritual safety, I can't be close to anyone who isn't doing things 100% because I am still in the shaky years of my sobriety.

Any advice?

Hi Im Sharon and Im an Alcoholic.

By the Grace of my HP and people
like you here in SR I havent found
it necessary to pick up a drink of
alcohol since 8-11-90.

For that and you I am truely grateful.

Changes in recovery. We all go thru them.

I suppose if we didnt have changes
then we wouldnt grow and mature.

For me, Ive gone thru many changes.
Forever shedding another peel of
an onion as it falling off.

Child abuse changed me from a shy
child to one full of fear. Fears and
insecurities handicapped into my
latter teenage yrs when i began
to drink.

That substance called alcohol gave me
courage and strength to face obstacles
in my life i wouldnt normally face with
out it.

A 25 yr marriage with half drinking
the rest sober. Drinking to cope
with a family. Drinking to fill a lonely
void. Drinking to belong.

In Feb. 1990 an accident didnt stop my
addiction nor stop me from trying to
end my miserable life.

Aug. 90 family intervention and a 28
day stay in rehab was another change
in my life. Them doing for me what i
couldnt do for myself.

Many many meetings thereafter. A
geographical move to Tx. for 10 yrs.
A failing marriage as i continued trudging
along the road of recovery, sharing
my experience strenghts and hopes
here and there for anyone to listen.

2006 I moved back to my hometown
leaving my little family in Tx. Kids that
were grown and in college and a husband
not wanting to relocate.

All the prayers and tears and forever
being answered and always being
guided by a Force greater than I
is still molding me and changing me
into an fine tuned instrument.

For the last few yrs. more changes
as my HP placed a person in my
life to share it with. I havent asked
for anything and yet I was blessed
with an awesome gift.......all this
due to turning my will and life
over once again and following
the principles of our wonderful
useful program. To finally recieve
the gift of HONESTY.

Once i achieved that then
FREEDOM as mentioned in
the promised was given to me.

This was another unbelivable
remarkable change in my most
rescent life.

Now for today.....i was let go
from my little job, due to
some unquestionable issues
with management.

This door im saying is closed and
will wait for a new one to open.

What change is about to happen
i wonder. Is it time for me to grow
some more? What does my HP
have in mind for me?

Only time will tell.

Till then, im in good hands.

So many changes and still more
to come.

Share ur changes with us if ud
like.

Thanks for letting me share.

My roommates girlfriend is a rcovering alcoholic, 2 years clean. She has quite a few sponcees & has not only been asked to speak at one of the local NA meetings, which she said was a big deal, but has also recently been asked to speak at some big convention next year.

I'm really good friends with her, but she doesn't know that I'm addicted to speed. I'd like to ask her to be my sponcer, but she is a tiny bit controlling and very obsessive about hitting meetings every day.

Really, my two main concerns are these:

1.) If I fail at becomming clean & relapse, she won't want me to be around her boyfriend, who is not only my roommate but my best friend as well. She's already told me that the best thing to do if he relapses is to kick him out.

2.) I have severe social anxiety, which is part of the reason I started taking speed. I've never found a.medicine that really helps, so once I'm off the speed, i doubt i will be able to hit many meetings. She already fusses at her boyfriend about it, and he hits at least 2 a week.

What do yall think? Should I ask her to be my sponser, or just get a list from one of the meetings and go from there?

My daughter has been involved in drugs and a drug lifestyle on and off for the last 10 years. (Mostly On) She has gone to treatment twice, many meetings, counselling and still does not get it. My question is for the loved ones of addicts -- How do you handle questions from others - friends, business associates or family members who ask how your children are doing? They are not asking from a meanspirited stance, they are asking so that they can catch up on your life. Most do not have a clue about her lifestyle. I usually say she is fine and change the subject.
Just curious how others handle this..
Thanks,

Drank late last night in the morning. Puked my guts up this morning. Feeling very bad. Liver hurts, stomach hurts. Heart beating all weird. I am a binge-drinker, and I usually only drink alone. I have been truly battling this for several years but just got serious about recovery today. I called my counselor and my girlfriend and confessed the true level of my problem. It felt pretty good, but I may lose my girlfriend because of it. I usually have problems after going three or four days (when my symptoms go away). After I start feeling better I let my guard down and slip right back into it and binge until I get sick, usually drinking for at least 2 or 3 days straight. Any hope/encouragement from fellow bingers? I need to start going to a group. My counselor recommend I go every day for the next two weeks. How do I find this many meetings in my area? I live in Orange County, CA, and couldn't find very many meetings going on anywhere near me this week.

From all the terrible things my addicted boyfriend has done to me. I have said some terrible things back to him. I am so ashamed and confused. It seems like the words I say stick to him. After him doing things such as pawning my jewelry, destroying my car, stealing a check, I have said to him that I hated him. I took it back and said that I hate the addict in him.... I am so confused. He is still human, he has a heart... but you know what? I have a hard time believing that he is clueless into the harm that he does and yet continues to do it... I have a hard time NOT hatting him.

I have said so many terrible things to him.

I have read so many books, so many meetings, and he does NOTHING. Yes, MAYBE that nothing is not doing drugs, but I have NO IDEA... If he did something, meetings, a job or something, maybe I would believe that all this sleeping he does is because he is tired from something other then the drugs I think he is taking. I am 31 and I want to have a family... I have become so poor from this man, with no money, no car and in debt... you and you know, I'm trying so hard not to hate HIM, because he has something to do with his addiction.