Archive for the ‘Mistake’ tag
the cheap detective………………….
:nyag
the cheap detective...................
the cheap detective?????????
his feet upon his desk, cigar smoke lingering above
looking out his window, no clouds in sight, sky blue
waiting for the next big case, this life is his love
and when a call comes in, a file he does make
knowing deep within, he can make no mistake
he goes thru the motions
name, address, phone, when can you come in
?I need all the details so I can get a lead?
he?ll check the facts, make some calls
very quickly,
he?ll have more information than he will ever need
quietly, he sits and waits, the minutes turn to hours
another puff on his cigar, it?s time to water the flowers
files upon the window sill, files upon the chair
files, files, and more files of ?case closed? everywhere
he?s got all the information from a to z
the only thing that?s lacking is a case from you or me
the phone rings again, he gives a short hello
he asks the right questions for what he needs to know
another file he makes and puts it to the side
his feet go back on his desk
as he lights another cigar
a glance out his window
the day is slowly ending
his office door ajar
a knock comes from the door, it opens very slow
?what can I do for you?? he says matter of factly, so so
?I?m looking for the cheap detective?
?come in, you are in the right place
tell me of the case?
he gets out another file, fills in all the blanks
another case to solve, another file to stamp ?closed?
he listens to the story, doesn?t believe a word
it a case that so many times before he?s already heard
but he is no judge; he?ll get all the facts
find out who did what to whom and why and when
so much info gathering, out of ink runs his pen
?I?m no ordinary gumshoe,
I?ll solve this case for you?
he?s so reassuring
he listens and listens some more
to this case that is so boring
it?s a job; he lives the life of a cheap detective
his feet upon his desk, cigar smoke lingering above
looking out his window, passing by a butterfly or two
waiting for the next big case, this life is his love
he grabs his hat, walks out the door
he?ll see this guy, that guy
soon he will know all he needs to know and more
a question here, a question there
puts 2 and 2 together, the answer will appear
his client comes to his office
?you have solved this case for me, how much do I owe you?
he gives a smile, no worry, :nyadI?ve solved your case for free
it?s a job, he lives the life of a cheap detective
his feet upon his desk, cigar smoke lingering above
looking out his window, the sun is setting, too
waiting for the next big case, this life is his love
the cheap detective...................
the cheap detective?????????
his feet upon his desk, cigar smoke lingering above
looking out his window, no clouds in sight, sky blue
waiting for the next big case, this life is his love
and when a call comes in, a file he does make
knowing deep within, he can make no mistake
he goes thru the motions
name, address, phone, when can you come in
?I need all the details so I can get a lead?
he?ll check the facts, make some calls
very quickly,
he?ll have more information than he will ever need
quietly, he sits and waits, the minutes turn to hours
another puff on his cigar, it?s time to water the flowers
files upon the window sill, files upon the chair
files, files, and more files of ?case closed? everywhere
he?s got all the information from a to z
the only thing that?s lacking is a case from you or me
the phone rings again, he gives a short hello
he asks the right questions for what he needs to know
another file he makes and puts it to the side
his feet go back on his desk
as he lights another cigar
a glance out his window
the day is slowly ending
his office door ajar
a knock comes from the door, it opens very slow
?what can I do for you?? he says matter of factly, so so
?I?m looking for the cheap detective?
?come in, you are in the right place
tell me of the case?
he gets out another file, fills in all the blanks
another case to solve, another file to stamp ?closed?
he listens to the story, doesn?t believe a word
it a case that so many times before he?s already heard
but he is no judge; he?ll get all the facts
find out who did what to whom and why and when
so much info gathering, out of ink runs his pen
?I?m no ordinary gumshoe,
I?ll solve this case for you?
he?s so reassuring
he listens and listens some more
to this case that is so boring
it?s a job; he lives the life of a cheap detective
his feet upon his desk, cigar smoke lingering above
looking out his window, passing by a butterfly or two
waiting for the next big case, this life is his love
he grabs his hat, walks out the door
he?ll see this guy, that guy
soon he will know all he needs to know and more
a question here, a question there
puts 2 and 2 together, the answer will appear
his client comes to his office
?you have solved this case for me, how much do I owe you?
he gives a smile, no worry, :nyadI?ve solved your case for free
it?s a job, he lives the life of a cheap detective
his feet upon his desk, cigar smoke lingering above
looking out his window, the sun is setting, too
waiting for the next big case, this life is his love
Merry Xmas Day 30 Bah Humbug
Merry Christmas to every body. I'm celebrating this day with day 30. Whoo hoo, I just don't seem to be all that happy about it today. I guess I'm wishing for a White Christmas. But I know that would be a mistake. It will be the 1st time for me to celebrate at my parents in 5 years. I'm so friggen nervous about going over there because all my brothers and sisters will be there. I started taking Celexa this week but I'm not so sure it is working. I just want this day to be over with. AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH
Hope all you guys have a Very Merry Christmas
:Xmasmc :Xmaselfa :Xmasbah
Hope all you guys have a Very Merry Christmas
:Xmasmc :Xmaselfa :Xmasbah
Motivational Quote of the Day
I subscribe to The Motivational Quote of the Day. Here's what arrived today
( minus the sales pitch for product):
"We hardly ever realize that we can cut anything
out of our lives, anytime, in the blink of an eye."
— Carlos Castaneda
As we approach the new year, you are starting to zero in on your resolutions, goals, and New Year promises. Be warned: Here’s the mistake most make: They simply have a resolution, with no plan, no foundation to make it work. They plan to read more, make more, eat less, spend less, but each hour in their day is spent in nearly the same way as before. Remember, through your mind and your choices, you can add, cut, or amend anything you need to in order to realize your new goals. You are in control — use it.
( minus the sales pitch for product):
"We hardly ever realize that we can cut anything
out of our lives, anytime, in the blink of an eye."
— Carlos Castaneda
As we approach the new year, you are starting to zero in on your resolutions, goals, and New Year promises. Be warned: Here’s the mistake most make: They simply have a resolution, with no plan, no foundation to make it work. They plan to read more, make more, eat less, spend less, but each hour in their day is spent in nearly the same way as before. Remember, through your mind and your choices, you can add, cut, or amend anything you need to in order to realize your new goals. You are in control — use it.
Life after divorce
OK, today I am divorced.
I did make a mistake, dated before the divorce was final. Did meet another Al-anon and found out the hard way it's not good to date another al-anon that is not going to counseling or al-anon.
Anyway we broke up last Friday. She wrote today and wanted to date again. I told her if she went to counseling or Al-anon I would reconsider this. She said no so I will not date her again.
Looks like it doesn't get any easier, I will just have to take it one day at a time.
Also I am going up to Portland, OR for the Holidays (More alkys to deal with).
I guess this is a step in the right direction, I realized the toxic relationship and bolted.
I did make a mistake, dated before the divorce was final. Did meet another Al-anon and found out the hard way it's not good to date another al-anon that is not going to counseling or al-anon.
Anyway we broke up last Friday. She wrote today and wanted to date again. I told her if she went to counseling or Al-anon I would reconsider this. She said no so I will not date her again.
Looks like it doesn't get any easier, I will just have to take it one day at a time.
Also I am going up to Portland, OR for the Holidays (More alkys to deal with).
I guess this is a step in the right direction, I realized the toxic relationship and bolted.
Stay with addict boyfriend?
Hi - Im not really familiar with this but I just want as many opinions as I can get. My boyfriend is in rehab for snorting heroin and smoking pot. I get to talk to him on the phone when he calls, but the whole situation seems so unfair, especially that we talk at his discretion. Last time he called in the middle of the day while I was out in public wanting to talk about how he doesn't want to talk to me anymore unless I stop talking to my ex boyfriend. I have lied to him before about seeing and talking to this guy because of past reactions. I have accepted this was a mistake and have not and will not lie about it. I am a generally honest person. It is not that I cannot give up talking to this guy. I know that I want to be friends with him and he is not ready for friendship. But, I am really uncomfortable with ultimatums. I love my boyfriend, and I think the world of him. We have a great connection when we are together and we have a lot of fun!
I guess my ultimate question is this: this is the second time I have been absolutely blindsided by my bf's heroine use. I had no idea he was using. From what I can tell he is doing really well and wants to change. He has changed and its only been two weeks! I can tell by the clarity in his voice and speech. I guess the question is, am I kidding myself? Am I completely naieve? My family has history of alcohol and drug abuse, maybe I am just attracted to the familiar. Any suggestions would be much appriciated.
I guess my ultimate question is this: this is the second time I have been absolutely blindsided by my bf's heroine use. I had no idea he was using. From what I can tell he is doing really well and wants to change. He has changed and its only been two weeks! I can tell by the clarity in his voice and speech. I guess the question is, am I kidding myself? Am I completely naieve? My family has history of alcohol and drug abuse, maybe I am just attracted to the familiar. Any suggestions would be much appriciated.
self-worth
I used to make the mistake of using the words self-esteem and self-confidence interchangably. Al-Anon has changed that for me. I have always had confidence in my abilities. After all, why would I knowingly take on an active alcoholic in my life if I didn't have the personal confidence that I could change him? (chuckle to myself)
What I was really lacking was self-esteem. I have always been kinda an overachiever....really competitive at times. In identifying some of my weaknesses, I've discovered that I was driven to do those things to increase my self-esteem..my self-worth. People would "see" me as good based on X, Y and Z that I accomplished. Only then, would I feel worthy. I was seeking validation externally....
So now, I am truly focusing on internal me.
Thanks for letting me share.
What I was really lacking was self-esteem. I have always been kinda an overachiever....really competitive at times. In identifying some of my weaknesses, I've discovered that I was driven to do those things to increase my self-esteem..my self-worth. People would "see" me as good based on X, Y and Z that I accomplished. Only then, would I feel worthy. I was seeking validation externally....
So now, I am truly focusing on internal me.
Thanks for letting me share.
It’s true…they do eventually call
And the timing...after my aha moment, my post this morning.
At first, it was small talk, how was I, how was Ryan, if it would be a problem for him to come and get his spare tire that he left apparently. I told him I was fine, Ryan was fine, things are good. And no problem about the tire.
Then it was on to the junk....he realizes he made a mistake, asked if I missed him, said it was good to hear my voice. I told him the relationship was unhealthy, and that I'm happier now, things are good. But I also let him know that yes, I do miss him, of course I do. He told me he misses me, and I said well you are with someone else now and he said "what if I wasn't?". And I said "If you are asking if you end things with her, are we going to go back to being together, the answer is no". Nothing has changed with him, I figure they must be having problems, either that or it's just now finally hit him that we are reallly done, that I'm not chasing after him. I don't know. I told him I had to go, I honestly did not know what to say. He told me to keep talking to him.
At first, it was small talk, how was I, how was Ryan, if it would be a problem for him to come and get his spare tire that he left apparently. I told him I was fine, Ryan was fine, things are good. And no problem about the tire.
Then it was on to the junk....he realizes he made a mistake, asked if I missed him, said it was good to hear my voice. I told him the relationship was unhealthy, and that I'm happier now, things are good. But I also let him know that yes, I do miss him, of course I do. He told me he misses me, and I said well you are with someone else now and he said "what if I wasn't?". And I said "If you are asking if you end things with her, are we going to go back to being together, the answer is no". Nothing has changed with him, I figure they must be having problems, either that or it's just now finally hit him that we are reallly done, that I'm not chasing after him. I don't know. I told him I had to go, I honestly did not know what to say. He told me to keep talking to him.
Hello To All
I put this thread in the new to recovery (alcoholic forum, Think I made a mistake)
As an Admin for a pc help site I know how frustrating it can be at times!
Here is the story thus far.
Where to start? I have been helping others on pc forums for years, so you would think I would feel at ease doing this!
My name is Brandon and about 5 years ago I had a kidney stone. The doctors gave me a prescription for Vicodin. Well I took the 2 I was supposed to and got real out of it and forgot I took 2 and took 2 more. All of a sudden I was struck with sooo much energy I cleaned the house (wife was happy) and stayed up for a whole day. This is where my addiction started.
About 3 years ago my doc would no longer prescribe me the pills so I started hospital jumping (I think that is what you call it) and I got pretty good at it.(stuck pins in my fingers to fake blood in my urine which show's a kidney stone etc.)
Now 4 years later I just moved to Indiana and have visited 4 hospitals about 4 or 5 times each. I am addicted to the energy they give me. I really dont get "high" off of them but get tons of energy. After reading a little bit it seems I dont take as many as one can. I usually take 4 or 5 7.5's a day. 3 at once and another 2 later in the day.
I find coming off of them though feels the same as others have expressed. Feels like getting hit by a truck, no energy depressed and agitated. My wife is getting fed up with it (as she should) I wish I knew what to do. My pride gets in the way of going to rehab, I also suffer from Panic Disorder and take 2 Mg's of Klonopin a day for almost 10 years. (have not abused those) and the Vicodin took care of the panic attacks as well. Have been off of them for 2 days now and just feel like crud. Have exhausted hospitals (which is good) just afraid I will start going to different dentists now and telling them my tooth hurts. I told my wife to hide the keys so I wont, but I have to go to work. She says I get really angry when she wont give me the keys (as she knows what I am up to).
Sorry for the long post but it feels good to tell someone (even if it is online) this story as I have not told anyone ever before (except the wife) I know it is not good for my kids to see me lying around when I come off the pills.
SO my question is what can or should I do?
As an Admin for a pc help site I know how frustrating it can be at times!
Here is the story thus far.
Where to start? I have been helping others on pc forums for years, so you would think I would feel at ease doing this!
My name is Brandon and about 5 years ago I had a kidney stone. The doctors gave me a prescription for Vicodin. Well I took the 2 I was supposed to and got real out of it and forgot I took 2 and took 2 more. All of a sudden I was struck with sooo much energy I cleaned the house (wife was happy) and stayed up for a whole day. This is where my addiction started.
About 3 years ago my doc would no longer prescribe me the pills so I started hospital jumping (I think that is what you call it) and I got pretty good at it.(stuck pins in my fingers to fake blood in my urine which show's a kidney stone etc.)
Now 4 years later I just moved to Indiana and have visited 4 hospitals about 4 or 5 times each. I am addicted to the energy they give me. I really dont get "high" off of them but get tons of energy. After reading a little bit it seems I dont take as many as one can. I usually take 4 or 5 7.5's a day. 3 at once and another 2 later in the day.
I find coming off of them though feels the same as others have expressed. Feels like getting hit by a truck, no energy depressed and agitated. My wife is getting fed up with it (as she should) I wish I knew what to do. My pride gets in the way of going to rehab, I also suffer from Panic Disorder and take 2 Mg's of Klonopin a day for almost 10 years. (have not abused those) and the Vicodin took care of the panic attacks as well. Have been off of them for 2 days now and just feel like crud. Have exhausted hospitals (which is good) just afraid I will start going to different dentists now and telling them my tooth hurts. I told my wife to hide the keys so I wont, but I have to go to work. She says I get really angry when she wont give me the keys (as she knows what I am up to).
Sorry for the long post but it feels good to tell someone (even if it is online) this story as I have not told anyone ever before (except the wife) I know it is not good for my kids to see me lying around when I come off the pills.
SO my question is what can or should I do?
When does sobriety date start?
If I made 1 mistake during my sobriety is the sobriety date from the time I decided to quit and went 230 days without using or is it from the date that I slipped up?
Just curious.
Thanks
Just curious.
Thanks
What drugs have done…
After consoling my 8 yr old adopted daughter (husband's biological grandaughter) for the umteenth time about her addict mother, I find myself reduced to tears. She is now blaming "forgetting her homework" every day for a week on "mommy". She is in advanced classes, but this is from her regular teacher. This has happened off and on for a few months now. The "mommy" card. She loves us but she misses mommy. She receives counseling but does not bring this up to her counselor. We were in touch with mommy when she was in jail in Sept. and October. Mommy chose not to ask for rehab and was released on community control. We made the mistake of letting Savannah write and receive letters from mommy. In hindsight it was a bad idea. We have never tried to exclude mommy, just that she needs to do the next right thing and she didn't do it. No idea where mommy is now since Oct. 14th release.
I am just feeling very sad and I know I am the adult here but it gets to me once and awhile. We feel like she is playing us at times. We get even more angry at mommy and we know that does no good. I hate this d**n disease and I hate what it has done to the lives of these children. Drugs are the downfall of society, I believe that. Our social system cannot support all the children of drug users, there are too many of them. We have never been able to and we never will, no matter who is president. I hate drugs and what these drugs have caused, I am so mad I could spit and much than that. I hate this disease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I am just feeling very sad and I know I am the adult here but it gets to me once and awhile. We feel like she is playing us at times. We get even more angry at mommy and we know that does no good. I hate this d**n disease and I hate what it has done to the lives of these children. Drugs are the downfall of society, I believe that. Our social system cannot support all the children of drug users, there are too many of them. We have never been able to and we never will, no matter who is president. I hate drugs and what these drugs have caused, I am so mad I could spit and much than that. I hate this disease!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
