Drug Rehab Options Blog

As we all know alcoholism is a progressive disease and no one starts out as a hard core alcoholic nor does everyone progress to that stage of the disease. I know many heavy drinkers that by most medical guidelines would be classified as alcoholics but they don't seem to fit the mold. They can, for example go to a party or family gathering and drink a lot, get very drunk but at the end of the day they can turn it off. They never miss a days work, lose jobs or families and their lives aren't really affected in any noticable manner. Many are able to live out their lives without negative consequences.

I know many people and family members who fit into this catagory and in a way I have always been a little jealous and wondered why they could pull it off and i could not. It almost seems like they have an "off switch" and I do not. Certain recovery programs espouse the idea that it's all learned behavior and the alcoholic can be retrained to drink normally. I have tried many times over the years to drink normally but could never get my "off switch" to work, once I started all bets were off.

I guess the reason I'm even posting this is that I still wonder if it really is a learned behavior or is it a bio-chemical brain chemistry thing that seperates the alcoholic from the heavy drinker. If it truely were a brain chemistry issue then you have to wonder if a drug will ever be invented to address the problem. Any thoughts.

hello. my mother was an alcoholic and died when i was 17. i'm 27 now, i don't have a drinking problem, but i can't help notice that i view life differently than most people. my mother was not physically abusive, but she liked to contort the truth and turn everyone against each other. i know a lot of people have had it worse than i have, and honestly i cannot recall really what was so bad about the past events. but i know that i'm effected by what happened. i judge myself so harshly that i almost cannot stand myself. i attempted suicide when i was 16 and realized that it wasn't the answer. i usually keep myself in isolation, my friends call me and sometimes i don't even answer the phone or call them back for weeks, which to them appears that i am ignoring them, which i guess i am. in social events like parties, i am usually really quiet and sit back and observe. its hard for me to find anything in life that i want, there is nothing that seems interesting to me or fun, i have no motivation to do anything with myself. i feel as if there is no hope for humanity, and at times, i hate people as a whole. i'm not an angry person nor do i have any ill feelings towards anyone. i try to find any escape from life i.e. video games, books, TV, anything that takes me out of this world that i don't find interesting. i am depressed and feel comfortable in it. i want to feel differently about life and myself, but its hard to break the mold and leave my security blanket. i think my father views me as lazy, and i suppose i am, but its more than that. how can i change this when, in a way, i don't want to?

Good morning all - I thought I would post an update and let you all know how I'm doing. First of all thank you so much for all your kind words, wisdom and sharing, it's made the last few months so much easier.

So, I left AH two weeks ago after giving him a very clear boundary, get a job or I'm leaving. He hasn't been working for almost 4 years and was a "dry drunk". The deadline came and of course no job. I told him I was leaving, picked up a few clothes and told him I would pick up my other things later. Within a hour he was plastered and has stayed that way.

It's hard to see that he threw away nearly 4 years of sobriety. Upon reflection though I believe he was looking for an excuse/someone to blame so that in his mind he could start drinking. Now he can say to himself/anyone, I relapsed, I started drinking because K left me. He won't accept responsiblity for his actions. I fully accept that I did not cause this, I can't control it and I can't cure it. He's on his own. I pray he finds true recovery/sobriety.

I picked up my other things furniture etc and am storing them at a friends. I've been able to rent a cute little house 10 minutes away from work. It was in terrible condition, filthy and full of mold and garbage. My wonderful friends have spent days helping me fix it. We all had to wear masks because it was so foul inside. It has had a total face lift now as we have gutted it right to the walls - lucky for me I'm in design/construction! The landlord has given me free rent for 4 months and reduced rent for 18 months in exchange for this work and material.

I had a few rough days at the beginning. Being alone (I'm housesitting right now) gave me ample opportunity to reflect on my life, the relationship, letting go. All kinds of emotions both positive and negative. Reading SR daily (well 3 times plus a day) helped enormously. I've done a lot of walking here on the property with my dog Kingston, he's a great listener!

I now have a clear idea of where I am and where I am going. I'm putting my needs first. I'm looking for a sponsor to help with the steps and am looking forward to it.

I'm still in shock at how calm I feel - I don't miss the insanity at all and in fact I didn't know I had that much until it was gone.

Thank you all again - K