Archive for the ‘Momentum’ tag
the 2 Lists for New Years
Note: i did not write this. It came to my email today from a website called the Daily Om, written by Scott Blum. I share it because I like it. Hope you do, too. Happy New Year!
"I was fortunate to spend time with an enigmatic man named Robert during a very special period of my life. Robert taught me many things during our days together, and this time of year reminds me of one particular interaction we had.
"Now that you are becoming more aware," Robert said, "you need to begin to set goals for yourself so you don't lose the momentum you have built."
"Like New Year's resolutions?" I asked.
"That's an interesting idea," he smirked. "Let's do that."
By then I was used to his cryptic responses, so I knew something was up because of the way his eyes sparkled as he let out an impish laugh.
"Tonight's assignment is to make two lists," Robert continued. "The first is a list of all the New Year's resolutions you WANT to keep, and the second is a list of all the New Year's resolutions you WILL keep. Write the WANT List first, and when you have exhausted all of your ideas, then write the second list on another sheet of paper."
That night I went home and spent several hours working on the two lists. The WANT List felt overwhelming at first, but after a while I got into writing all the things I had always wanted to do if the burdens of life hadn't gotten in the way. After nearly an hour, the list swelled to fill the entire page and contained nearly all of my ideas of an ideal life. The second list was much easier, and I was able to quickly commit ten practical resolutions that I felt would be both realistic and helpful.
The next day, I met Robert in front of the local food Co-op, where we seemed to have most of our enlightening conversations. "Tell me about your two lists," Robert said as the familiar smirk crept onto his face.
"The first list contains all the things I SHOULD do if I completely changed my life to be the person I always wanted to be. And the second list contains all the things I COULD do by accepting my current life, and taking realistic steps towards the life I want to lead."
"Let me see the second list," he said.
I handed him the second list, and without even looking at it, he ripped the paper into tiny pieces and threw it in the nearby garbage can. His disregard for the effort I had put into the list annoyed me at first, but after I calmed down I began to think about the first list in a different light. In my heart, I knew the second list was a cop out, and the first list was the only one that really mattered.
"And now, the first list." Robert bowed his head and held out both of his hands.
I purposefully handed him the first list and held his gaze for several seconds, waiting for him to begin reading the page. After an unusually long silence, he began to crumple the paper into a ball and once again tossed it into the can without looking at it.
"What did you do that for?!" I couldn't hide my anger any longer.
Robert began to speak in a quiet and assured voice. "What you SHOULD or COULD do with your life no longer matters. The only thing that matters, from this day forward, is what you MUST do."
He then drew a folded piece of paper from his back pocket and handed it to me.
I opened it carefully, and found a single word floating in the middle of the white page:
"Love."
"I was fortunate to spend time with an enigmatic man named Robert during a very special period of my life. Robert taught me many things during our days together, and this time of year reminds me of one particular interaction we had.
"Now that you are becoming more aware," Robert said, "you need to begin to set goals for yourself so you don't lose the momentum you have built."
"Like New Year's resolutions?" I asked.
"That's an interesting idea," he smirked. "Let's do that."
By then I was used to his cryptic responses, so I knew something was up because of the way his eyes sparkled as he let out an impish laugh.
"Tonight's assignment is to make two lists," Robert continued. "The first is a list of all the New Year's resolutions you WANT to keep, and the second is a list of all the New Year's resolutions you WILL keep. Write the WANT List first, and when you have exhausted all of your ideas, then write the second list on another sheet of paper."
That night I went home and spent several hours working on the two lists. The WANT List felt overwhelming at first, but after a while I got into writing all the things I had always wanted to do if the burdens of life hadn't gotten in the way. After nearly an hour, the list swelled to fill the entire page and contained nearly all of my ideas of an ideal life. The second list was much easier, and I was able to quickly commit ten practical resolutions that I felt would be both realistic and helpful.
The next day, I met Robert in front of the local food Co-op, where we seemed to have most of our enlightening conversations. "Tell me about your two lists," Robert said as the familiar smirk crept onto his face.
"The first list contains all the things I SHOULD do if I completely changed my life to be the person I always wanted to be. And the second list contains all the things I COULD do by accepting my current life, and taking realistic steps towards the life I want to lead."
"Let me see the second list," he said.
I handed him the second list, and without even looking at it, he ripped the paper into tiny pieces and threw it in the nearby garbage can. His disregard for the effort I had put into the list annoyed me at first, but after I calmed down I began to think about the first list in a different light. In my heart, I knew the second list was a cop out, and the first list was the only one that really mattered.
"And now, the first list." Robert bowed his head and held out both of his hands.
I purposefully handed him the first list and held his gaze for several seconds, waiting for him to begin reading the page. After an unusually long silence, he began to crumple the paper into a ball and once again tossed it into the can without looking at it.
"What did you do that for?!" I couldn't hide my anger any longer.
Robert began to speak in a quiet and assured voice. "What you SHOULD or COULD do with your life no longer matters. The only thing that matters, from this day forward, is what you MUST do."
He then drew a folded piece of paper from his back pocket and handed it to me.
I opened it carefully, and found a single word floating in the middle of the white page:
"Love."
Here I am
I thought I would just jump in to say hello. I don't have much to say, I'm not looking for a lot, I have been drinking. I do want to stop, I want to forget about the past and move on. I haven't been committed enough recently. I don't want to hide anymore either. I'm not in the worst of spots, my six months off really did help with my mentality with alcohol, but I am no fool. I've been lucky, and I know things could get bad for me. Besides, I don't want to drink anymore. I just don't feel good, it's just a bad mix for me. So here I am for now, sober and trying to get my spirits and momentum back up so I can try again.
It is a ‘new’ life..I can assure you
...and its so much better than the previous one.
My last drink was on 23rd April 2008...seven months ago a 27 year drinking career ended. The spiral of negativity stopped and a new life started.
Its Sunday morning here in the UK and i was up at 8am without a hangover. Every day I look back and ask myself 'what have I achieved'...I didnt drink, thats what I achieved and I am so proud of myself.
I still get the urge to drink and I doubt that it will ever go away, I dream of alcohol every now and then and when i wake up i get that 'thank god it was only a dream' feeling.
This is an unstoppable train, I have seven months under my belt..the momentum is there to make 8 months. I used to buy my beer/wine in a supermarket up the road...never been in there since, at one point I was embarrassed as they started to recognise me as only buying alcohol.
I was down the beach recently with friends at a party....towards the end it suddenly dawned on me that I was enjoying myself yet I was sober...first time in my adult life..43 years old.
Im not going into the improved physical side of things as they pale into total insignificance compared to the mental battle and daily victories I have achieved..needless to say its been worth it.
This forum has been excellent, to be honest its the first time ive been back in a few months as I had reached a point in my recovery where I felt reading the stories of those who were struggling was actually having an effect on me..almost giving me an excuse to fail as well...I cant really explain it but I appear to be over that obstacle now.
Ive developed a 'routine' , a routine that ensures that I dont drink. This routine is encapsulated in my head and it got me through the summer lets see how it handles Christmas.
Also on a positive side I have actually developed a craving for soft drinks. I need to have those soft drinks every night in place of my alcohol, thats part of my routine...how good is that eh!....I enjoy it,it gives me a different kind of buzz.....who cares if my teeth fall out..:lmao:
My last drink was on 23rd April 2008...seven months ago a 27 year drinking career ended. The spiral of negativity stopped and a new life started.
Its Sunday morning here in the UK and i was up at 8am without a hangover. Every day I look back and ask myself 'what have I achieved'...I didnt drink, thats what I achieved and I am so proud of myself.
I still get the urge to drink and I doubt that it will ever go away, I dream of alcohol every now and then and when i wake up i get that 'thank god it was only a dream' feeling.
This is an unstoppable train, I have seven months under my belt..the momentum is there to make 8 months. I used to buy my beer/wine in a supermarket up the road...never been in there since, at one point I was embarrassed as they started to recognise me as only buying alcohol.
I was down the beach recently with friends at a party....towards the end it suddenly dawned on me that I was enjoying myself yet I was sober...first time in my adult life..43 years old.
Im not going into the improved physical side of things as they pale into total insignificance compared to the mental battle and daily victories I have achieved..needless to say its been worth it.
This forum has been excellent, to be honest its the first time ive been back in a few months as I had reached a point in my recovery where I felt reading the stories of those who were struggling was actually having an effect on me..almost giving me an excuse to fail as well...I cant really explain it but I appear to be over that obstacle now.
Ive developed a 'routine' , a routine that ensures that I dont drink. This routine is encapsulated in my head and it got me through the summer lets see how it handles Christmas.
Also on a positive side I have actually developed a craving for soft drinks. I need to have those soft drinks every night in place of my alcohol, thats part of my routine...how good is that eh!....I enjoy it,it gives me a different kind of buzz.....who cares if my teeth fall out..:lmao:
One Small Thing
Another lovely thought from Ralph Marsden's daily reading that I'd like to share with you/
One Small Thing
One good thing naturally leads to another. So go ahead, right now, and do one good thing.
Just one simple positive step is enough to create some solid momentum. Go ahead and take that small step.
The challenges of life may seem overwhelming. Get yourself moving, just a little bit at first, in a positive direction, and those challenges will suddenly feel a lot smaller.
You don't get to the top of the mountain in one enormous leap. You get there one small step at a time, and from the moment you begin the view just keeps getting better and better.
What one small thing could you choose to set the tone for the rest of this day, or even for the rest of your life? There are so many possibilities available to you.
Move just a little bit in the direction that you know is good and right for you. Once you get going, you won't want to stop.
-- Ralph Marston
One Small Thing
One good thing naturally leads to another. So go ahead, right now, and do one good thing.
Just one simple positive step is enough to create some solid momentum. Go ahead and take that small step.
The challenges of life may seem overwhelming. Get yourself moving, just a little bit at first, in a positive direction, and those challenges will suddenly feel a lot smaller.
You don't get to the top of the mountain in one enormous leap. You get there one small step at a time, and from the moment you begin the view just keeps getting better and better.
What one small thing could you choose to set the tone for the rest of this day, or even for the rest of your life? There are so many possibilities available to you.
Move just a little bit in the direction that you know is good and right for you. Once you get going, you won't want to stop.
-- Ralph Marston
5 Months this week
Hello fellow sobriety pilgrims,
I haven't posted or even lurked in quite a while. Life is busy and focused elsewhere, but that's good I guess.
What's keeping me from drinking? Oh yes, I still get the occasional strong urge to "relax" with that tumbler full of golden, smooth, Canadian Velvet on ice.
I was looking back at an entry from Aug 13 in my journal: "Praise God (my hp) as the momentum and healing continue. I continue to be impressed with the intertwined relationship of alcohol abuse and other abuses. Give up the one, and the others become manageable."
That is what has been keeping me sober. Fits of un-managed anger, or lust, or womanizing, or irresponsible internet behavior... Being sober means these other monsters loose much of their power. And, not indulging in them, takes pressure of needing to drink. The vicious cycle.
Thanks for letting me share,
Paul
I haven't posted or even lurked in quite a while. Life is busy and focused elsewhere, but that's good I guess.
What's keeping me from drinking? Oh yes, I still get the occasional strong urge to "relax" with that tumbler full of golden, smooth, Canadian Velvet on ice.
I was looking back at an entry from Aug 13 in my journal: "Praise God (my hp) as the momentum and healing continue. I continue to be impressed with the intertwined relationship of alcohol abuse and other abuses. Give up the one, and the others become manageable."
That is what has been keeping me sober. Fits of un-managed anger, or lust, or womanizing, or irresponsible internet behavior... Being sober means these other monsters loose much of their power. And, not indulging in them, takes pressure of needing to drink. The vicious cycle.
Thanks for letting me share,
Paul
